Jokes for Kids

Posted: Friday, October 18th, 2013


jokes for kidsIllustration by Corey Fields

At a recent staff meeting, a few of us class clowns started telling our favorite jokes for kids. We wanted to share the best ones, because let’s face it: laughter is a learning power tool. It staves off boredom, helps calm test anxiety, and can be a great ice-breaker when kids get frustrated. So next time you need “a good one”, rattle off one of one of these jokes for kids from your friends at

Do trains have teeth?
Well, then, how do they choo?

What did Sushi A say to Sushi B?

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Owls who?

What’s brown and sticky?
A stick.

How many apples grow on a tree?
All of them.

Two atoms are walking down the street together. The first atom turns and says, “Hey! You just stole an electron from me!”
“Are you sure?” asks the second atom.
The first atom replies, “Yeah, I’m positive!”

What did one snowman say to the other?
“Do you smell carrots?”

What building has the most stories?
A library!

What’s a pirate’s girlfriend’s name?

Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in! It’s cold out here!

Will you remember me in a year?
Will you remember me in a month?
Will you remember me in a week?
Will you remember me in a minute?
Will you remember me in a second?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?

What’s a cow’s favorite date?
The moo-vies.

Why did the ghost go to the opera house?
He loved classical boo-sic.

Where does a king keep his armies?
In his sleevies!

How much do pirates pay for their earrings?
A buccaneer!

What did the magician say when he lost his rabbit?
Hare today, gone tomorrow.

8 Responses to “Jokes for Kids”

  1. Candice Abellon Says:

    the carrots joke got me when it was told to me. I was like, “Oh, I don’t smell carrots.” it’s all about the delivery!

  2. Mercedes Says:

    Nice jokes to tell my girls, thank you. We always do the knock knock jokes. They’re so silly. Here’s one for ya:
    Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cee Lo. Cee Lo who? See love, I came for you.

  3. Lian Perry Says:

    Why did the bacon laugh?
    Because the egg cracked a yolk.

    Funny jokes, thanks!

  4. Candice Abellon Says:

    Haha oh those are nice ones, Mercedes and Lian :)

  5. Alison Says:

    Knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Amos who

    Knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Nuda who?
    A-nuda mosquito

  6. Paul Says:

    My grandfather used to ask me this when I was a kid and I never gave the correct punch line, didn’t realize it until he passed…

    Q: What do you think of the high price of cheese
    A: It stinks!

  7. Barry Says:

    How do you catch a unique rabbit?
    Unique up on it.

    How do you catch a tame rabbit?
    The tame way.

  8. Melanie Says:

    How do you get a tissue to dance?

    You put a little boogie in it!!

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