parent and special ed teacher

parent and special ed teacher

my son is 9 years old and one of the special ed teachers at the school took him to get tested for ADHD at a center in lawton.  A few months later i got the results in the mail and it explained about how his background was on the first page and it read  "the mother has 6 children and all by different fathers."  I have 3 boys and 3 girls.  Yes the first 3 are by 3 different men and the other 3 are by the man im with now.  It said the special ed teacher said this and her name is carrie.  On the second paragraph it read that carrie said the mother has a history of "substance abuse."  Its also read that carrie said that "christians home is Chaotic."  My son has a good and wonderful life at home.  His dad is always taking him fishing and playing baseball with him and we take wonderful care of him and his brothers and sisters and i do not have a history of substance abuse at all.  Carrie said alot of things that arent true at all.  I want to know what i can do about this.  He is going into the 3rd grade and still cant read at all.  Im concered about him and what can i do about the special ed teacher saying all the lies?
Reply from: Harrellm Date: Jun 17, 2008 at 11:05 pm

It sounds like the special Ed teacher knows what she is talking about.  A home is like a ship, and the mother, if single, or the parents if living togethor, are the captains. If the captain is unable to keep the ship on track it will sink. This needs to be thought of daily. each day the ship can sink. each day the captains need to provide the same stable, love and discipline. The Captain needs to never show his or her weaknesses or the ship can sink. The captain needs to make good choices as an example to her children. And if the captain has made some bad choices in her past, she needs to correct them as much as possible. Having children by differant fathers can happen, But three was a big mistake. You need to love your children and work harder because you have six children now. One thing you need to do is teach your son to read by reading to him, or turning off the TV. It can be that simple. If you don't want the Special Ed teacher to evaluate your son without your knowledge then try your hardest to show that you are competent.

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Reply from: tmp123 Date: Jul 6, 2008 at 12:49 pm

First of all, did you give your consent for the special education department to have him tested?  If so, you should have been given papers concerning your parental rights.  I believe it is the LAW that you should have been given these papers detailing your rights.  

One thing you should know is that you have the right at any time to call a meeting with his teacher, the special education teacher, and an administrator should you think that any of the information or "treatment" is in error, not effective, or if you just need clarification.

Have you contacted your child's principal?  If this teacher is placing incorrect information on your child's documents, you must insist that it be corrected immediately!  I would call an emergency meeting with the principal and follow up with a letter to the superintendent of the school district.  

Placing untrue information in a child's file is a serious offense!  You have legal rights!  Ask an attorney to advise you if you feel the school isn't reacting quickly enough.  But, this is serious and you need to act.

As far as your child not being able to read, it sounds as if there is a possible learning disability.  He should be receiving special services to assist him in reading.  If not, then you must act on his behalf to get him help.  

While reading to him is extremely important, if he is dealing with a disability, then he will need explicit, systematic instruction to help him deal with his reading challenges.  Don't give up - I know it's hard and your heart is breaking for him.  But you will find the missing piece that you've been searching for.  But you need to ask for help from those individuals who truly are helpful - unlike this particular teacher.

Parenting is difficult.  We have no textbook, no map, and just when we think we have it figured out, something changes.  Having six children is a blessing and you should be commended for all that you do.  Keep loving your little one and making him feel special and loved.  Him knowing that will help pull him through some difficult times.  But most importantly, stay involved with his school experience.  Make sure they are doing right by him.  

Good luck to you!!  

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Reply from: miraclemom Date: Jul 23, 2008 at 3:34 pm

i agree with tpm 3, sounds to me to that teacher is in the wrong filed you need to speak up every meeting you go to see if you could get your child removed from that class comments she  made very judgemental and  you should not take that b, s from anyone,. god bless and good luck,.mm

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Reply from: miraclemom Date: Jul 23, 2008 at 3:38 pm

i am a divorced mom and a survivor of domestic abuse i myself have adhd and my daughter is auttistic i am raising her myself and help with grandma no one can judge or comment unless they walk in our shoes,,n i would definitely  file a complaint against that teacher,.mm

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