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How to Hear What Your Child is Really Saying (page 3)

How to Hear What Your Child is Really Saying

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based on 17 ratings
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Updated on Sep 26, 2011

If you and your child both share the problem, and the issue must be addressed, make sure to present your child’s side of the story first and to present the disagreement as a problem to be solved. For example, you might say, “You feel that you should have a lock on your door to keep your little sister out. I don’t feel comfortable with any door in our house being locked so that I cannot access it. Let’s think if there’s anything we can do so that we’ll both be satisfied.”

Often you may find your child is more willing to come up to a solution to the problem and follow it than to simply follow your way of doing things. Inviting your child to be a part of the problem solving process and weigh in with her own opinions and ideas will make her more likely to adhere to and support the solution you both come up with. George also maintains that “the best way to raise responsible children who make their own decisions is to let them actually make their own decisions!”

Communicating well with your children, and making sure that you truly understand what they are saying, can give your children the strength inside themselves to come up with their own solutions to problems. Harsh discipline or heavy-handedness does the opposite, creating fear and resistance instead. So the next time there's a problem involving your child, try some of the tips mentioned above. You may be surprised by how much more easily you’ll be able to understand your child and hear what she's really saying.

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