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Are You Parenting like Your Parent? (page 2)

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Updated on Sep 17, 2012

It can feel threatening to separate from the people who we once relied on for care and safety. Yet, by having compassion for our child selves, we can extend this feeling to our children. We can differentiate from our parents’ less desirable attitudes and traits, while maintaining qualities that we admired in them.

Once we make the connection between past events and our present behavior, and once we have feeling for ourselves and the struggles we endured, we become much stronger in our effort to challenge the negative traits we have as parents. We can question critical or indulgent attitudes and behaviors toward our children that don't seem to fit the situation. We can start to separate from the parents we don’t want to be and become the people we’d like our kids to one day imitate.

Read More on Parenting from Dr. Lisa Firestone on PsychAlive.com.

Dr. Lisa Firestone, Ph.D., is the director of research and education for the Glendon Association. Since 1987, she has been involved in clinical training and applied research in suicide and violence. In collaboration with Dr. Robert Firestone, her studies resulted in the development of the Firestone Assessment of Self-Destructive Thoughts (FAST) and the Firestone Assessment of Violent Thoughts (FAVT). Dr. Firestone has published numerous professional articles, and most recently was the co-author of the books: Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships (APA Books, 2006), Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice (New Harbinger, 2002) and Creating a Life of Meaning and Compassion: The Wisdom of Psychotherapy (APA Books, 2003).

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