How do I tell my 4 year old daughter that her dad is having a baby with another woman?

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eliorossy asks:

I have been divorced for a year now and just found out from my exhusband that he got a girl pregnant and the baby will be born in two weeks. I don't know how to explain this to my daughter specially when my ex is not dating the woman and don't even know how much he will be involved in the babies life.

In Topics: Communicating with my child (The tough talks), Motherhood, Blended families

> 60 days ago

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ShirleyCressDudley

May 4, 2010

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What the Expert Says:

It's good that you want to do what's best for your 4-year-old daughter. Since you don't know how much her dad will be involved in the raising of this child, or if your daughter will meet this child any time in the near future, it's best to hold on to this information, and watch the situation, as it progresses. A 4-year-old doesn't need to know everything. There is plenty of time to explain a half-sibling to her, as you figure out what part this child will have in her life.

Kindest Regards,
Shirley

Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC
Founder of The Blended and Step Family Resource Center
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fritzr writes:

I'm not sure why you feel it is your duty to explain anything to your daughter when it is about your ex and the choices he made. This could either have a big impact or no impact at all on your daughter. If it turns out to have little impact then you can wait until she is older to let her know she has a half sister (if her dad hasn't told her by then). If it has a big impact then your ex should explain himself to her and you should be there for your daughter to try to make sense of it all when she has the inevitable questions.

> 60 days ago

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