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Anonymous
Anonymous asks:
Q:

How do I deal with my child who doesn't listen?

MY 3 and half year old doesn't listen . I feel she understands what I say but eventually does what she wants to do. I feel she socially embarrasses us . Took her for her friends birthday party, there she was going from one room to another room. Took the camera from host and started clicking when told her to return it she started crying . She was given party cap to wear , there again she started making choices instead of accepting what was given to her. Sort of asking  to have more caps . When the cake box was being opened she was the first one to stand to have a look at it. When offered food she was asking to be served first wherein she hardly eats other than chips out of the food served. She was asking for chocolates , chips, as if she has never seen it or eaten it. It was hell of embarrassing. I was constantly telling her to behave herself she didn't miss any opportunity to throw tantrum or act as if she doesn't care what I say or do. Even if I take to shops she constantly keeps touching things. At home also she constantly has to spoil something or the other. When comes to food she picky eater . I feel she is constantly challenging me as a mother. I am feeling disheartened not knowing how to deal with her. Before we go anywhere I try to explain and tell her how to behave , she agrees but later on throws tantrums and doesn't bother in public place. I am losing my patience. Please help me to deal with my child . Becoz I know she is important and precious to me.
In Topics: Discipline and behavior challenges
> 60 days ago

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JorickSacatani
JorickSacat... writes:
Talking vs. being heard
Mother: "I've informed you a googolplex times to abstain from vexing your sibling."

Child: "Huh, Mom?"

When you talk to your kids, you must keep a few things in mind.

If you have something to say, and you want to be heard, do the following:

Get down to your children's level.
Use simple words.
Get to the point.
Don't yell.

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TeacherandParent
TeacherandP... writes:
3 1/2 year old children are still learning what it means to listen. How firmly do you say 'no'? She may be understanding what you're saying but she may not believe that you mean it. Some children are more active than others and have shorter attention spans. I had to trail my son from room to room - he could not sit and focus as did many other children - and as a consequence, we often left parties early. It was tiring to trail him from room to room. To get my son to participate in the children's games, I had to participate as well - that helped him to focus and modeled for him how to interact in the games.

Tell her 'no' there are aren't enough caps - every child gets one and add something positive "yours is a very pretty color? When she asks to be served first, say "we must wait our turn like everyone else." Just telling a child to behave themselves may not be specific enough. Before taking her to shops tell her "we can look but can't touch" - "we can touch toys at home but not in the shops."

Lots of kids are picky eaters these days and different families handle that in their own way. My sister made one dinner - her children could eat it or not. My mother said we could eat the dinner she made or we could have cereal with milk.

Does your daughter go to preschool? Preschool can help with helping a child to learn how to behave when out in the world. When she throws a tantrum at home, so be it. Don't give in to a tantrum. And if she doesn't behave in public places, take her home, right then and there and next time tell her she can't go because she didn't behave the last time. Not every 3 1/2 year old is ready to go to every public place. It can take active children longer to learn how to control themselves in public places.
> 60 days ago

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AMDaniele
AMDaniele writes:
Hi,
Being a mom to a child so young is always stressful.  So, first of all, give yourself some credit!  Second, no matter what you choose to do, be consistent - do it all the time, no matter what time of day or where you are at the time - otherwise children look to create that "out" opportunity.  They think - oh, I only have to behave at home - but I know mom won't send me to timeout in public, etc., etc.  And, third, make sure you only repeat yourself once - and at the 3rd time, there is some consequence.  So, if she refuses to eat other foods - then at the 3rd request, the chips (or chocolate) or whatever go away.  In that way, you are consistent - and avoid acting out of anger.  And, finally, again, cut yourself some slack, you are human, it is okay to be frustrated.
> 60 days ago

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ypduodu
ypduodu writes:
dont feel disheartened, 3 year olds are a handful ; trust me i feel your pain. I have twin girls that are 3 and believe me i know how you feel. What someone suggested to me was to try and get your child into some sort of sport  activity like gymnastics or karate. A lot of the things you are describing my twin girls do that also and it is challenging but try to remain patient. I put my kids in time out a lot when they act out. The time out works also as it helps them think about what they did and that forces them at least temporary to act better. Good luck ok.
> 60 days ago

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jessie.v
jessie.v writes:
as she is a kid, she do like that !
don't feel bad and heartbreaking ! she will be alright as she grows. and the most important thing is to keep her in a place of good surroundings and of a nice climate, because the climate and the surroundings also shows the  effect on your child !!!
                                               best wishes......!
> 60 days ago

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