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Anonymous
Anonymous asks:
Q:

My husband doesn't love my son, and bully's him. What should I do??

My son is now seven but was 1 yr old when he was introduced to his stepfather. From the time that my son was little my husband didn't have any kids so I just assumed that it would take him a while to adjust to this new life. Now years later, it is still the same. When my son was little the split between his father and I was hard on him and he became very clingy, always wanting to be held or cuddled. My husband always threw comments out there about it and how annoying and bad it was for me to allow him to lay with me or snuggle all the time. He is very distant and never spends anytime with my son. The only time that he ever attempts to do anything is when I tell him,(and he will fake it for a day or so) that if he cant play an active role in his life then he should refrain from discipline as well. He makes fun of his real father all the time (in front of my son) and we end up fighting about it later, bc I don't care how lazy his real father his my son shouldn't hear that. He's has told me in the past that he thinks my son has ADHD, has a bad attitude, and is disrespectful.  My son has good grades, great at sports and loves his sister dearly. My son is still so little he doesn't understand why his stepfather doesn't love him (and has asked me one more than one occasion). Just this morning my son said good morning to him and he ignored him. We have one child together (girl) and one on the way, I worried that if we have a boy that things will become increasingly worse. Plse help
In Topics: Blended families
50 days ago

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Expert

ShirleyCressDudley
Mar 20, 2014
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What the Expert Says:

I am so sorry you are having a difficult time. You have mentioned several issues. I recommend couple's counseling for you and your husband. Find someone that is skilled in blended families.

Look for someone who also specializes in marriages.

I wish you the very best.

Kindest Regards,

Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC NCC FACMPE
Founder and Executive Director of The Blended and Step Family Resource Center
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Additional Answers (1)

Athena109
Athena109 writes:
Well what i think is that you should let them spend more time together for he can see that he see that your son is not that bad, also tell him how you fell but also put it straight forward and don't let him end it having it his way but don't get to aggravated because then it well by real bad take deep breathes and relax. If he loves his sister dearly point it out to him that it could actually be that he is very nice and that they could play sports together.
50 days ago

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