Marebear
Marebear , Student asks:
Q:

My mom is depressed that she is losing her job. How can I help her?

I really  need advice on how to help her relax. Im giving her a pampering day and for 2 hours im going to massage her, but what about the rest of the time?
In Topics: Parenting / Our Family, Motherhood
> 60 days ago

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Expert

lkauffman
Aug 30, 2010
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What the Expert Says:

What a sweet and thoughtful daughter you are! I think it is wonderful that you are working hard to support your mom through this difficult time. Your ideas for helping her to relax are very nice (and luxurious!). A two-hour massage! Wow! Here are a couple of additional ideas:

1. Sometimes folks who have recently lost a job feel discouraged by the idea of entering the job market again. Help your mom gain some confidence by sharing some ideas for how she can get started with her job search. There are plenty of books and resources online for individuals to get advice on updating their resume and contacting prospective employers. Visit the website of your local public library and seek out books that will likely help your mom get started. Print out the list and share it with your mom.

While you are on the internet, check to see if the library or other community agencies have job search courses. Share any information you find with your mom.

2. Give your mom ideas for relaxation techniques she can practice at home. Many people benefit from the practice of relaxation techniques that they can do at home. Some techniques include progressive muscle relaxation and deep breathing. Tips and advice for practicing these techniques are included in the article link below.

3. When people get depressed, they often become lethargic and lose motivation. Help your mom to keep moving with a light exercise regimen. Offer to go for an evening walk with her several times a week around the neighborhood or go to the nearest high school and walk the track or climb the bleachers together. By staying active, your mom will be better able to ward off sad feelings.

Finally, it is important that you listen to your mom's struggles, but it is also important that you don't take over the mothering role for your mom. If you feel like you are carrying the burden in the household, talk with a few relatives or close friends of hers to let them know that your mom needs additional support at this time and allow them take over some of the responsibility.

Good luck to you and your mom.

Warm regards,

Laura Kauffman, Ph.D.
Licensed Child Psychologist
Education.com JustAsk Expert
http://www.drlaurakauffman.com/
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Additional Answers (3)

Marebear
Marebear , Student writes:
Thank you so much for the ideas. I tried to get my mom in a good mood by being silly some time and it works. We know a lot pf people who get get her a job, its just that my mom is a bit stubborn and her pride gets in the way as well. The exercise idea was amazing. My middle school isn't far from my house so my mom and I started walking to the school, she tells me a couple stories from when she was a kid, the we walk back. I never would have thought of that! Thank you again for the ideas and compliments. They have been working. I couldn't have beared it any longer without your help. Thanks again.
> 60 days ago

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resumescentre
resumescentre writes:
ACTIONS YOU CAN TAKE TODAY

1. Recognize psychological mutilations, for example, concentrating on the negative ("Yes, I have a degree in bookkeeping however a year ago I committed I error on a spreadsheet!") and manage them.

In the event that you've been on antidepressants before and they have helped, possibly it's an ideal opportunity to utilize them again – converse with your specialist!

2. Don't simply "endure it"; please understand that you have a privilege to feel tranquil and substance, and no one advantages from your inclination down.

3. Impart your experience to others, with your loved ones, with a neighborhood care group, or on the web.

4. Visit an instructor; here and there only maybe a couple visits can have a significant effect.

5. Rehearse reflection and unwinding.

6. Instruct yourself; read a book, for example, Listening to Depression.

7. Use resume services for your new resume writing.

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john18967
john18967 writes:
Group facilitator and life coach Michal Fisher has been accompanying people on their journeys to self-fulfillment and happiness in their personal and professional lives. `Accompanying ` is the operative word here, as Michal, with her degree in psychology, understands motivational skills. But her gifts don't end there: she has immersed herself in such varied forms of thought as psychodrama, creative writing, guided imagery, voice training, music, Buddhism and Jewish studies. Reading her very fine book HOW TO FIND YOUR CAREER PATH WITHOUT LOSING YOUR MIND all of this background comes into play and that is the reason following her guidelines is so productive.

In this succinct book she focuses on the fact that our emotions control our careers, namely self-esteem, self-image, identity, values and meaning. In discussing and exploring these areas Michal delves into how we deal with love, happiness, self-esteem, fear, disappointment, anger, grief, and guilt in ways that seem like first encounters with dealing with these very personal issues. She presents these psychological theories in a business-minded approach and goes a step further in utilizing a spiritual outlook that includes, of course, tools such as guided imagery and meditations. The entire book is serious in purpose, but Michal adds humor and personal history as well as borrowing quotations from a significant number of types of famous people to keep her writing grounded in warmth and credibility.

As the author states, `The guide in front of you will help you reflect deeply, dig up hidden treasures within yourself, and emerge as you are meant to be: creative, vibrant, and more determined; it will directly affect your career and your quality of life.' After only a few pages of reading every reader will sense the concern and caring and initiative in Michal Fisher's glowing abilities as a writer and coach. Grady Harp, January 14
> 60 days ago

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