My 2 year old son has begun hitting and having frequent meltdowns. He hits when he is frustrated and understands that hitting is wrong, but when told he must apologise he says he can't. He also tells us he hates us. He will say, I want to kick Spohie ( his 7 month old sister) or i want to poke Sophie in the eye, and when we tell him no or have to physically stop him he melts down. He refuses to eat, bathe of do anything we ask him to, everything , even routine things , are an epic battle. I am frustrated beyond my limits. We do not spank, how do we deal with this behavior?