I think my son's father is trying to get my son to hate me. What should I do?
I have been having this issue with my son's father since our son was born and still don't know what to do to stop it. Everytime he gets upset with me, I overhear him tell our son that 'mom is just a b***h', 'mom is lazy and can't get off the couch to go to work. she can't pay me the money she owes me, so because of her, i can't take you anywhere'. (even though, i am off work due to an injured knee and following my doctor's advice to stay off of it). i am going through a hard time due to my injury and have asked for his help, seeing as i have helped him in the past by getting him a full time job at my work. He pays child support, 80.00/month..should be paying more, but he told me he could not afford more than that, so i was ok with it...he helped but not without him putting in his 2 cents in with our son. I know I don't deserve it, I just want to put a stop to it, but don't know how. I've tried taking him to court, but because i didn't have enough proof that he was doing all that. Really, I don't want to go to court, as I am concerned that it is going to get blown way out of proportion, and will cause my son's father to become worse. I just want everyone to get along. Please help me figure out how to stop it.
I'm sorry you are having these difficulties. I would need more information to properly answer your question. Are you separated or divorced from your son's father?
Has child support been decided by the court?
I encourage you to get couple's counseling- if your marriage isn't over.
If it is over- then talking with an attorney to create a separation agreement, including not "bad-mouthing" each other in front of your son- is in order.
I wish you the very best.
Shirley Cress Dudley, MA LPC NCC FACMPE
Founder and Executive Director of The Blended and Step Family Resource Center