Child Development Guide: 3-4 Years (continued)
Source: Washington State Department of Social and Health Services
Topics: Early Years (Birth-5), All Developmental Milestones (Ages 3-5)
Topics: Early Years (Birth-5), All Developmental Milestones (Ages 3-5)
EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT: Three to Four Years |
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| Normal Characteristics | Suggested Behaviors for Effective Parenting |
| Is sensitive about the feelings of other people toward self. | Develop a warm relationship with child. Express and show love for and confidence in the child. |
| Is developing some independence and self-reliance. | Encourage independent activity. |
| May have fear of strangers, animals, the dark. | Never force the child to participate in frightening activities. Don't ridicule. Provide a night light. |
| Is anxious to please adults and is dependent on their approval, love, and praise. | Give approval through facial expressions, gestures, and verbal responses. Avoid negative remarks about the child. Emphasize the family's love for the child. |
| May strike out emotionally at situations or persons when having troublesome feelings. | Offer love, understanding, and patience. Help child work with and understand own emotions. (Note: Some temporary regression and jealousy are common if a new baby arrives.) |
| Emotional Development for Two to Three Years | Emotional Development for Four to Five Years |
| Return to Using the Child Development Guide |
SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT: Three to Four Years |
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| Normal Characteristics | Suggested Behaviors for Effective Parenting |
| Can leave mother for short periods but mother is still very important. | Express interest in what the child has been doing while away from parent(s). |
| Begins to notice differences in the way men and women act. Imitates adults. | Model the things you want the child to do, since at the start of gender role development the child will imitate adults. |
| Starts to be more interested in others; begins group play; likes company. Is not ready for games or competition; groups are not well formed. | Provide enough materials so that several children can use them together. Help the child find socially acceptable ways of dealing with others. |
| Social Development for Two to Three Years | Social Development for Four to Five Years |
| Return to Using the Child Development Guide |
MORAL DEVELOPMENT: Three to Four Years |
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| Normal Characteristics | Suggested Behaviors for Effective Parenting |
| Begins to know right from wrong. | Provide clear limits; enforce them consistently, but not harshly. |
| Finds other's opinions of self to be important. | Praise the child whenever you honestly can. Focus on behavior; be explicit, e.g., "You ate all the peas, and peas are good for you," or "That drawing has such beautiful colors," instead of "I like that drawing." |
| Is more self-controlled and less aggressive. | Notice and reinforce child's self-control, e.g., the ability to wait, to share belongings. |
| Uses extreme verbal threats such as, "I'll kill you," without understanding full implications. | Don't take threats personally or too seriously. |
| Moral Development for Two to Three Years | Moral Development for Four to Five Years |
| Return to Using the Child Development Guide |
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Reprinted with the permission of the Department of Social and Health Services.
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