Helping Children Cope with War and Terrorism

Background

The terrorist attack on September 11, 2001, did more than shake our nation to its core. It undermined our sense of security and set us on a perilous journey into uncharted territory. All of us, including our children, are dealing with grief, sadness, tension, anxiety, fear, anger and other strong emotions. Economic uncertainty only adds to our stress. As we try to return to normal, our emotional reactions will continue to evolve. Future events are likely to bring more emotional stress. Therefore, it is important that we develop long-term strategies to help ourselves and our children cope.

Things to Expect

"Returning to Normal"

• The advice to "return to normal" is sound. However, we need to realize that our "normal" has been redefined. There will probably be an undercurrent of anxiety which will ebb and flow as events unfold.
• Everyone processes emotions on a different timetable. There is no correct schedule for returning to normal.

Intense Emotions

• Expect intense emotional reactions ranging from sadness to fear to relief. These reactions may be unpredictable, coming and going without warning.
• Depression can be a reaction to tragedy. Warning signs include ongoing sleep problems, feelings of hopelessness and guilt, and extreme sadness.
• Intense anger may make us want to strike out and look for someone or some group to blame.
• The ongoing tension can make us grumpy or edgy with others, leading us to "take things out" on the people closest to us.
• Feelings of guilt may inhibit people from finding enjoyment.

Stress and Anxiety

• People feel more anxious when it seems like things are out of control. This is particularly true for children.
• Uncertainty accentuates anxiety.
• Heightened anxiety can lead to difficulty sleeping, paying attention, and remembering.
• Prolonged stress suppresses the immune system, leading to greater susceptibility to illness.
• Many people eat more when under stress.

Coping Strategies for All Ages, Children through Adult

Relationships

• Talk to people about what you are feeling.
• Stay connected with family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, etc., to avoid feeling isolated.
• Avoid blaming entire groups of people.
• Reflect according to your religious or spiritual beliefs. Spiritual rituals and discussions can be very important activities to do as a family and as a community.

Education

• Learn about the issues involved in the tragedy and the subsequent events.
• Monitor your sources of information. For example, pay attention to media that help you understand what is happening and avoid media that simply exploit your emotions.

Health

• Watch your diet. Many people over-eat when they are under stress, which can lead to further feelings of guilt, sadness and hopelessness.
• Get regular exercise to help relieve stress and take your mind off the tragedy.

Activity