What Happens When You Put Family Needs First?

I’ll never forget the sorrow and fear I felt as my wife and I watched the helicopter take my son away … possibly for the last time. After three weeks of hospitalization and a year’s worth of daily breathing treatments, Garrett fi nally emerged with a clean bill of health. But that day remains with me forever.

When Garrett’s emergency struck, I was lucky. I had a boss who gave me all the time I needed to help my son and family recover. When I fi nally returned to work, my boss and colleagues couldn’t have been more supportive. What did this do for me? It reaffi rmed my commitment to the company. When things returned to normal, I was more determined than ever to prove my worth to the organization.

Since my experience with Garrett, I’m often amazed how managers and corporations forget that working fathers have a life outside of work. When we think of work/life effectiveness, it’s assumed that those types of policies are for women only. Nothing could be further from the truth. Working moms and dads need a work environment that allows them to adequately respond to the changing needs of their family. When this is done, both the organization and the employee will see the dividends they yield as a result of their commitment.

Peter Senge, author of the book The Fifth Discipline, said: “There is a natural connection between a person’s work life and all other aspects of life. We live only one life, but for a long time our organizations have operated as if this simple fact could be ignored, as if we had two separate lives.”

When we help working fathers find life-balance, it also helps working mothers. Three out of four households today are dual-earner couples. It should not be any surprise that employees with families report significantly higher levels of interference between their jobs and their family lives than they did 25 years ago. In fact, men report higher levels of interference between their jobs and their family lives than women do in the same situation.ⁱ

In addition:

• Over half of all fathers report they are under a “great deal of stress” managing the pressures of work and the demands of home.ⁱⁱ

• Dads who work long hours tend to spend less time with their kids, and the negative effects grow steadily as work hours grow.ⁱⁱⁱ

• Children who are less attached to their fathers at age five are more anxious and withdrawn and less self-confident at age nine. They are less likely to be warmly accepted by their peer group and well-adjusted at school, based on teacher and peer reports.iv Is it any wonder that over 7 out of 10 fathers say they would take a pay cut for more time with their families? Shouldn’t businesses take note? Guess what happens when they do? Men do better at their jobs AND at being involved, responsible, and committed fathers. Men who successfully balance work and family life are better dads and are more successful at work. In other words, when dads balance work and family life, it is good for their children and for their careers.

• “For men, those very skills [of a leader] are the ones most successfully learned and mastered by the well-adapted father.”^v

• Devoted dads on average were more likely to thrive in their careers. ^vi

• Fathers who cared for their children’s intellectual development and their adolescents’ social development were more likely to advance in their occupations.” vii When employees find the right work/life balance, the company benefits. This year’s Fortune magazine’s List of Best Places to Work posts Smuckers at the top spot. The company boasts a workplace culture that celebrates the individual and promotes respect for all as if employees were family. The result? The company has not only had incredibly high worker satisfaction, but the company’s stock has had a total return of 100 percent over the past five years. Other studies point to the same thing:
  • Harvard University found that raising employee satisfaction by 20 percent could boost a company’s financial performance by more than 40 percent.
  • DePaul University compared the fi nancial performance of the companies on Business Ethics’ list of “100 Best Corporate Citizens of 2002” with the S&P 500 and found them to be “significantly better,” based on factors like sales growth, profit growth, and return on equity.

The National Fatherhood Initiative is dedicated to helping dads be the best they can be, and this includes helping them and the organizations they serve create a positive, father-friendly working environment. The reason is simple: Doing so is the best thing for families, for employees, and yes, for the organizations they serve. As more and more organizations come to this realization, I believe we will not only be more successful, but more fulfilled as well.

ⁱ The National Study of the Changing Workforce, Families and Work Institute, September 2003

ⁱⁱ Career Builder.com, June 2003

ⁱⁱⁱ Sandra Hofferth, University of Maryland, February 2003

^iv Catholic University, Leuven, Belgium

^v William Pollack of Harvard University

^vi “How Fathers Care for the Next Generation,” Emory University psychologist John Snarey vii “Childhood and Society” by Erik Erikson

To see all of the National Fatherhood Initiative's quarterly newsletters, go to https://www.fatherhood.org/ftnewsletter.asp.