Your Parenting Style

The Wonderful Three-Year-Old

Source: University of Florida IFAS Extension

Overview

Age three marks an exciting time for both you and your child. At this age, children are full of energy and are very enthusiastic about living. As a parent, you can reinforce this enthusiasm by focusing on your child's positive qualities.

Your child is very curious. He watches and listens to everything that goes on around him. He will ask a lot of questions about things he sees and does not understand. Be patient and take the time to answer his questions. This is how your child learns. When you have a positive attitude about answering questions, you encourage his love of learning.

These are special times to interact with your child. When you explain an idea to him, make eye contact and get down on his physical level. Also, keep your explanation simple. Your three-year-old is not looking for an in-depth answer. A few words are usually enough to satisfy his curiosity.

As your child grows and learns, his third year will be filled with changes. Here are some ways he will develop physically, socially, emotionally, and intellectually.

Physical Development

A three-year-old can move quite well. She can run quickly, jump, kick, swing, and pedal a tricycle. She has good balance and can stand on one foot for a few seconds or carry a drink without spilling it. Make sure to provide a safe environment where your child can exercise and move her large muscles. Take her to the park and encourage her to climb the monkey bars and swing on the swings. Let her play with various toys such as a ball, a tricycle, or a wagon that she can use in active play. Also play active games with her such as catch or follow the leader.

At three, a child uses small muscles more frequently. Your child can scribble with crayons, handle a fork and spoon, and use buttons and zippers. With greater control of her hands, your three-year- old will be able to do more tasks for herself. She will be able to feed herself, help dress and undress herself, wash and dry her own hands, and brush her own teeth. Be sure to allow enough time so your child can do things on her own. When she does things on her own, your child will feel successful and competent.

Sometimes your child will become frustrated by what she cannot do. Encourage your child and give her plenty of opportunities to practice. You might even buy or make a toy that helps her practice skills such as using buttons and zippers. As your child succeeds with each task, praise her for a job well done. Try to make your praise specific by describing what you see. For example, say, "You did a great job dressing yourself! You put on your socks and buttoned your shirt and combed your hair."

Social Development

A three-year-old feels a strong need to please his parents, unlike a two-year-old, who often resists. He imitates the way they talk and act and tries to conform to their expectations. Because of a three-year-old's desire to please, he will often be cooperative.

Your child will be very aware of what you and other adults think and say about him. He will understand if you criticize him to someone else. Instead, let him "overhear" you say good things about him to other adults. This is a good way to nurture his self-esteem.

A three-year-old can be lively and talkative. He has his own thoughts and ideas and he enjoys sharing them. When your three-year-old tells you about his experiences, take time to listen to him. Show interest and ask him questions. For example, say, "You saw a dog on your walk with Granddad? What did the dog look like?"