Asking for Help

Talk to others. Watch for signs that your teenager may need help.

Being a parent can be hard work. Parents don't have all of the answers and may need to ask for help. Asking for help only means that you are trying to be the best parent you can be. Parents walk a fine line. They try to help their children become independent, while still guiding them and setting limits. Teens walk a fine line too. They want to leap into adulthood. But they still need their families' guidance and love. Research shows that kids do better when they have a strong, positive relationship with their parent(s). 1 Therefore, it is important for parents to be involved in their children's lives, even if it requires asking for help.

Talk to friends, other parents, or your own parents. Ask their opinions. Get suggestions. Share ideas. But stick to what you think is best for your child, even if your views don't match those of other parents.

Get to know the parents of your children's friends. Talk to them whenever you see them at school or at events. If they call looking for their child, take the opportunity to chat with them about what you expect from your child. You can agree on curfews and other rules. You can keep track of your kids together.

Make sure your kids have adult supervision after school and before you get home from work. This is a time when many teens are likely to get into trouble. After-school programs like sports, clubs and other activities can help teens stay out of trouble. Talk to your children's school counselor or other parents about the types of programs available.

Consider getting a mentor for your teen. Teens with mentors have better relationships with parents and peers. They are less likely to use drugs, be violent, or skip school. They are more likely to make good grades.

Make an appointment with your pediatrician to talk without your child present. Many pediatricians are experts in adolescent health. A sk the doctor for ways to encourage your child to be healthier. Ask what is normal or acceptable teen behavior.

Talk to your child's school about resources that can help you. They can help you deal with your teen's behavior problems, substance abuse, or academic problems.

Ask your teen if he/she is thinking about hurting him/herself or others. Take it seriously if he/she says yes and get help. Just asking that question could help you stop your child from committing suicide or hurting others.

Watch for other signs that your teenager may need help. Awareness that there may be a problem is the first step. When teens are using drugs and or alcohol, their behavior changes. Be alert and pay attention to the signs that there may be a problem.

Participate in parent groups or workshops run by your school or community organizations.