Interventions To Improve Behavior And Discipline

Shaping Behavior at Home and in School

All children need structure. Creating a predictable environment for a child is an important part of fostering his physical growth and mental development. Structure provides a safe environment in which to develop healthy self-esteem. Clearly defined rules and expectations that are consistently reinforced can limit the need for discipline.

Step 1: Establish Boundaries

Children do not have natural behavioral boundaries. Parents need to help their children establish boundaries of what is and is not acceptable behavior for a given situation. This can be done by creating rules, establishing consequences, and providing reinforcement.

Creating Rules   Rules are needed both in the classroom and in the home. Teachers, parents, and children should work together to think of rules that should be followed at school and at home. Allowing a child to help create the rules gives her some ownership of them and increases the likelihood that they will be followed. No more than five or ten rules should be created; the more rules there are, the more likely a child is to forget them. In order to help a child remember the rules, post them in a few places around your classroom or home, such as in the play area, near the classroom door or the board, in the kitchen, or in her bedroom. Periodically reviewing the rules also is helpful, just to be sure she remembers them. If a child's behavior is getting worse in one area, it may be helpful to create a new rule to address this behavior.

For older children, it is acceptable to state actual rules—for example, "Toys are to be put away after I play with them"; "I will put all of my clothes in the hamper before I go to bed"; or "There is no running in the hallway." The "House Rules" and "Classroom Rules" charts in Appendix D can be used to post the rules and the consequences for breaking them, which we'll talk about in the next section. Verbally reminding the child ("Mark, remember the rule that says 'no running in the house'") helps him to remember the rules; you may need to use this strategy after a new rule is implemented. You can use a check mark or a tick mark to indicate whether the child followed the rule. Again, before he goes to bed, review with him how well he did that day. Encouragement and praise will go a long way in helping a child to change his behavior.

Young children may not fully understand how to follow rules, so it's often better to set positive behavior goals instead of rules. For example, "I will wash my hands before I eat"; "I will put away my toys"; and "I will brush my teeth in the morning and before I go to bed" are common goals. You can use the "Positive Behavior Chart" in Appendix D to record the goals and the child's daily progress. When he completes a goal, draw a smiley face in that column. If he forgets the goal, draw a frowning face in that column. The faces provide a visual reminder of his daily performance. It is a good idea to review that day's progress with him so that he can see how well he did. Verbally praise him when he does well, and encourage him to do better when he does not.

Establishing Consequences   Establishing consequences helps a child understand the relationship between misbehavior and its consequences. In order to learn right from wrong, she must learn that if she breaks the rules, there will be consequences. We like the idea of using a Consequences Jar—a jar that contains a number of consequences written on small pieces of paper or index cards that have been created collaboratively by you and the child. This technique can be used at home or in the classroom. Brainstorming about consequences can be a productive and meaningful activity that promotes creativity and personal responsibility. If a child misbehaves and you feel she deserves a consequence, ask her to choose one of the consequences out of the jar. This procedure also helps to minimize verbal backtalk such as "That's not fair!" because she chose the consequences herself. Examples of consequences include "No dessert," "No TV after dinner," or "Going to bed thirty minutes early."

Providing Reinforcement   It is important to praise a child when his behavior has been good on a particular day. If he has earned many smiley faces on the Positive Behavior Chart or few negative check marks on the "House Rules" or "Classroom Rules" chart, you should tell him that he did a good job, that he should keep up the good work, and that you are proud of him. There are many ways to provide a child with positive reinforcement, both verbally ("Good job!" or "I like your good behavior!") and nonverbally (a smile or hug). It is important that you make a conscious effort to provide this type of reinforcement on a regular basis. Positive reinforcement will help a child build self-confidence. Children want to please their parents and teachers, and this type of reinforcement increases the chances that he will continue to exhibit good behavior. Children have both good days and bad days, just as adults do, but the goal is to maximize the number of good days. These good days will serve as a model for positive behavior in the future.

Step 2: Follow Routines

Establishing routines brings consistency to a child's life. Parents can work with their children to create morning, after school and homework, and bedtime routines. These routines should be followed each school day.

Morning   Morning routines should be the same every day so that a child knows what to expect and can learn to get ready with little supervision. A typical pattern might look like this:

Get out of bed → Brush teeth → Wash face → Get dressed → Make bed → Eat breakfast → Go to school

Once you decide on the pattern that works best for you and your child, you may want to list the tasks and post them in her room or the bathroom so that she can follow them more easily. For younger children and those with reading problems, you can use pictures to represent each of the tasks.

School   A child's school routine will depend largely on the classroom schedule and the services the child is receiving. He may follow the classroom schedule for part of the day but leave at a certain point in order to receive speech services or other special education services in another classroom. He should have a set schedule soon after a school year begins, and once a schedule is set, it can be written down for him to follow.

After School and Homework   Whether a child goes straight home or to after school care, a routine can be established. If she goes home, decide whether you want her to do all, some, or none of her homework before she gets time to play. Some parents prefer that their child complete work as soon as she gets home so that the day's lesson is still fresh in her mind; others say "Let kids be kids" and give their child some free time first, believing that playtime right after school is important in order to give the child a break from academics. You must choose the routine that works best for you and your child. In making a decision about your child's routine, it is important to realize that your child should follow the same routine each day. The routine for homework will depend on whether the child has homework, how much, and the amount of help and supervision she will require. For younger children and children who have no homework, create a routine that includes a snack, playtime outside for exercise, dinner, TV time, book time, and individual time with you. In establishing homework routines, it is very important to set aside a consistent place where homework is to be completed. If at all possible, it is best to restrict homework to locations that are away from high-traffic areas. (For example, doing homework on the kitchen table can be a good thing unless this area is where the family often congregates to talk and share daily information.)

The amount of time a child is expected to spend on homework will depend on your school district's curriculum, the difficulty level of a class, the child's ability, and the child's own expectations. For example, the amount of time a child spends on homework may be correlated with the grade that he or she receives. If a child wants high grades, he will likely invest the time to complete all of his homework. If a child's doesn't care about school and has low expectations for his grade, he will likely not spend much time on homework. We recommend the following guidelines for the number of homework minutes, which are based on a child's developmental level. The time spent on homework may also vary according to the severity of a child's disability.

The time spent on homework at each sitting may vary according to a child's age and disability. A child with ADHD, for example, may be too inattentive to sit through a forty-five-minute homework session; it may be necessary to break homework time into several sessions. A child with a physical disability may also find it difficult to sit up for an extended period of time and may need multiple homework sessions.

Bedtime   A nighttime routine helps a child prepare for a good night's sleep. Like a morning routine, a bedtime routine should follow a typical pattern such as this one:

Brush teeth → Wash face → Take a bath (on days when the child needs one) → Put on pajamas → Read book with parent → Talk about the day's events and what he learned → Go to sleep

Giving a child a thirty-minute period to wind down will help him to relax and fall asleep more easily. A sleep routine is important, and children benefit from positive sleep habits even at an early age. A good sleep routine includes waking up and going to bed at roughly the same time each night, including weekends. In general, children need between nine and eleven hours of sleep; some children may require more or less, depending on their day's activity level.

When to Change a Routine   Sometimes a change in routine may be necessary.

Here are three instances when you might want or need to change a routine:

A special occasion necessitates an exception. It may be necessary to change a routine because of a special event such as a party, a vacation, or a sporting event. When such a change occurs, it is important to point out to your child that you are making the change because it is a special time, but that she will go back to her regular routine when it is over. In certain situations, an exception to a routine may be a reward for good behavior.

A routine is no longer appropriate. Much of what you do with a child depends on his developmental level. As the child matures, you may find it necessary to change his routine to provide additional homework time, for example. And as he gets older, his bedtime may be pushed to a later hour or he may need to get up earlier for school. You may also ask him about his routine and give him the opportunity to give you feedback.

A child is not adapting to the routine. Some children may have difficulty making\ a transition from one routine to another. If a child has never had a good routine, she may initially struggle when a routine is implemented. Give her some time to adjust. After a reasonable period—say, a month—if you find that she is not adapting well, you will need to adjust the routine accordingly. Maybe she is not getting enough sleep or she needs more free time to play. Again, if you think she is mature enough, be sure to ask her about it. Older children are able to verbalize what they see as not working in their routine.

Step 3: Set Limits

It is important for parents to set limits. Children need to understand that there are rules that must be maintained on a consistent basis. Parents can set time, material, and behavioral limits.

Time Limits   A child must learn to minimize time spent on certain activities and maximize time spent on others. At home, parents may need to teach him that time for watching TV, talking on the phone, playing video games, and playing on the computer is a privilege and as such must be earned by displaying good behavior. Even when the privileges have been earned, we recommend that you limit these activities to a reasonable number of hours per week and instead maximize your child's time with reading, puzzles, games, the arts, and creative play. In the classroom, children must learn to increase their on-task behavior and minimize time spent in socializing, playing with objects in their desk, and other nonproductive activities that can interfere with classroom performance.

Material Limits   It is in a child's best interest to place limits on material items. Children tend to think that the sky's the limit when it comes to owning things. If they have too many toys, they tend to play only with the new ones and a few select favorites, forgetting about the rest. A child does not need all of the latest toys, games, and electronic equipment; purchasing a few new toys for your child at major holidays is fine. Limiting the number of toys, games, and other play materials will help her to learn self-control and promote creativity. Parents and teachers should have a common understanding about whether it is a good idea for a child to bring play materials from home to school and which toys a child is allowed to bring from home.

For some children, having a TV in their bedroom may interfere with good study or sleep habits. In such a case, emphasize books and the importance of reading prior to bedtime and perhaps read with the child, if she is still young enough to enjoy that. It is often advisable to take a child to the local library in order to develop her interest in books or story reading. Mature children should have their own library card and be responsible for returning and renewing their borrowed materials.

Behavioral Limits   Children must learn that the appropriateness of some behaviors depends on the setting and situation. It is often acceptable, for example, to yell outside but not inside a house, school, or store, which leads to a difference between "inside voice" and "outside voice." Learning to control impulses is a complex process that is affected by a child's developmental level, personality, environment, and disability.

Children must also recognize the difference between requesting something once and asking for it repeatedly. Requesting a cookie once or twice is fine, but not ten times. The limits imposed on this behavior have implications for their social interactions, too, because many peers may find such insistent behavior annoying.