Sleep and Bedtime Problems

Sleepless nights are a fact of life for new parents. Sleep — or lack of it — is probably the most-discussed aspect of baby care.

New parents discover its vital importance those first few weeks. The quality and quantity of an infant's sleep affects the well-being of everyone in the household. The fact is that infants are not programmed to sleep through the night.

Because they don't have the capacity for large quantities of food, they need nourishment at regular intervals around the clock. There are no shortcuts to lengthen an infant's sleeping schedule, but you can encourage nature's own sleep transition, which occurs at about five months of age.  

Babies eventually can learn to put themselves to sleep. But it takes time and your patience. Don't always rock the child to sleep and then put him in the crib — place them in the crib before they are completely asleep, so they become accustomed to going to sleep in the crib. 

How Much Sleep Do They Need?

Infants: Newborns sleep an average of 16 to 17 hours per day, but they may only sleep one or two hours at a time.

Toddlers/Preschoolers: 10 to 12 hours of sleep each night

Infant Sleep Positioning and SIDS:The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that parents and caregivers place healthy infants on their backs when putting them down to sleep. This is because recent studies have shown an increased incidence of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) in infants who sleep on their stomachs. There is no evidence that sleeping on the back is harmful to healthy infants.

During the toddler years, children make the change from two to one long nap, and usually sleep about eleven hours at night. Bedtime problems at this age are very difficult to deal with because it's hard for parents to tell the difference between a real need (an illness or a fear, for instance) and the child's impulse to control and hold power over the parents, which is typical of toddlers.

This difference is not easily apparent to toddlers either. Their feelings are just as strong whether they awake at midnight scared by an unusual noise or mad because there's no one to play with. Throughout childhood, but particularly in toddlerhood, the child's need to be able to count on the parents can at times conflict with the child's need to learn competence and independence.

Parents must be particularly sensitive to the fact that they must attend to both providing nurturing and to encouraging independence.

As a parent, there are several things that will prove very helpful to you when you're faced with a toddler who has developed a bedtime problem.

One is every toddler's love of ritual and routine. If you make the whole going-to-bed routine friendly, relaxed, and the same from night to night, you stand a better chance of things going smoothly.

Shape your routine so one step leads to the next, and let your toddler handle as much of the washing, tooth brushing, laying out clothes for tomorrow, and selecting a story as possible. You can move things along by having parallel jobs: "I will wash the tub while you turn out the light and pop under the covers."