Study Abroad: Surviving Reverse Culture Shock

Avoid the "grass is always greener" syndrome

Don't become a victim of the "grass is always greener" syndrome. Everything is better over there. Nothing is good here. Remember that every country has its flaws and its strengths. It is easy to dramatize how wonderful your return home will be. It is similarly easy, when you've returned home, to over-romanticize your experience abroad. Be careful not to make a habit of scapegoating: blaming others for your readjustment problems. Neither life here nor there is ever perfect. So if home isn't quite the paradise you remember, know that life would probably not be perfect in your abroad country either.

Revive relationships

You've been away for a semester or a year. Realize that the friends you were close with when you left, even if you kept in touch with them, will seem different when you return. You and your friends have had unique experiences during the time you were apart. Maybe she was studying abroad, too. Or maybe he met the love of his life in the university library while you were gone. You have all changed, and you may need to adjust to interacting in different ways. The distance you feel from your friends isn't permanent. And your new experiences can make for some very interesting conversations.

If parents, siblings, or friends express bewilderment or annoyance with your behavior after you've returned home, this could be a signal that you're either experiencing reverse culture shock or that your personality has changed as a result of being abroad. The best thing you can do is explain what reverse culture shock is and tell them this is what you're experiencing. If they know what is happening to you and that you're simply in the middle of the readjustment process, they can be more supportive and understanding of what you're going through. Good communication with family and friends reduces reverse culture shock.

Maintain language proficiency

One of students' biggest fears when returning home after spending time in a non-English speaking country is that they will lose their newly acquired foreign language skills. Because you spent time and effort developing language skills that are difficult to acquire in a college classroom, try the following suggestions for maintaining your language proficiency.

• Keep up your language studies by registering for a language class.
• Ask the international student adviser or dean whether any students are on campus from your host country/region. You may be able to practice your language skills with them - and make a new friend.
• See whether any residents from your host country are in your local area and looking to learn English. You can make arrangements for a language exchange - you tutor them in English in exchange for having conversations in their native tongue.
• Stay in touch with your friends and host-family abroad. Periodically call or e-mail them so you can practice your language skills.
• Tune into news broadcasts in your foreign language by using a short wave radio or the Internet. Read newspapers and books in your host language. Rent movies or watch TV in this language.

Take these additional hints to ease the transition

If you're experiencing a bout of reverse culture shock, here are some helpful hints to minimize the amount and length of stress you're feeling so that you can readjust to your U.S. life.

• Remember the coping strategies you developed overseas and use them! You increased your self-reliance while abroad and probably developed a few coping skills as you went through culture shock.
• Keep your sense of humor; be flexible and open-minded.
• Focus on the positive aspects of returning home. You can talk to family and friends without running up a huge phone bill! You can eat at your favorite restaurant! You can function in a language you're completely comfortable with and everyone understands you. You no longer get lost when trying to find the library.
• Practice patience with yourself and others. Appreciate the rare privilege of having two "homes."
• Refrain from bombarding your friends and family with nonstop pictures, anecdotes, or perspectives of your host country. They simply may not be interested in hearing endless stories about your host country, and their boredom will only frustrate you more.
• Don't try to do too much. Take good care of yourself and ease back into life here. In particular, realize that you need time to adjust to the hectic pace and pressures of university life. Gradually increase your day-to-day academic and extracurricular pace. You may find that you tire easily, both physically and mentally, if you take on too much too soon.
• Your old time and stress management tricks may no longer work, so explore other options. Even if you can now roll out of bed and go to class, you may find yourself missing your walk to school each day. So get up and go for a walk before your day begins. Or are you used to not doing work on the weekends because the libraries at your host university closed? Try to plan your schedule so you don't have to spend the weekends in the libraries here either.
• If your values and beliefs have changed, learn to incorporate your new way of thinking into your life.
• You may discover that you're frustrated by the lack of opportunities to apply the new skills you learned while abroad. I, for example, was unable to find a trampoline team that I could bounce with and so my trampoline skills went undeveloped after I returned home. Maybe while you were away, you learned to cook and made your own dinner every night. Now you're back at the mercy of the dining hall. While it may not be possible to have your own kitchen or show off other newly acquired talents, change what is possible and use your creativity!
• Find someone who is willing to update you on the university, local, and national changes and events that may have happened while you were away.
• Talk to others who have studied abroad and have already successfully readapted. They can suggest ways of dealing with reverse culture shock and they will understand how you feel.
• Seek out fellow study abroad returnees. They may be experiencing the exact same feelings, so communicating with them may be very easy. They can also provide you with support as you readjust. Don't be afraid to make a few new friends with whom you can share your international experiences. However, while these returnees can be a good support group, be careful that they don't become your only friends.
• Stay in touch with your abroad experience by taking a course with international flavor; try a history, political science, or literature course that covers your host country. Use your experience as a starting point for a thesis or independent research project; stay informed about international events and events in your abroad country.
• Get involved with international students; join international or multi-cultural clubs; go to foreign language tables at lunch. International students typically enjoy making new friends who know a little about their culture or how it feels to live abroad.
• Become a peer adviser or volunteer for your home university study abroad office. This allows you to stay in touch with the international world, while sharing your fantastic experience with potential study abroad students.

Never forget how lucky you were to study abroad in the first place. Most people in the world do not have the time or money to simply pack up and live in another country, and this perspective may make you less hostile to people who just don't "get" living abroad.

If you need more information

If you're struggling with reverse culture shock or just want to learn more about it, the following four books provide a more in depth discussion of the transition from life abroad to life at home.

• The Art of Coming Home, by Craig Sorti. Yarmouth, ME: Intercultural Press, 1997.
• So You're Coming Home, by J. Stewart Black and Hal Gregersen. Global Business Publisher, 1999.
• Students Abroad: Strangers at Home, by Norman Kauffman, Judith Martin, and Henry Weaver. Yarmouth, ME: Intercultural Press, 1992.
• Strangers at Home: Essays on the Effects of Living Overseas and Coming "Home" to a Strange Land, ed. by Carolyn Smith. Aletheia Publishers, 1996.