When the Love Bug Bites: Surviving Your Teen's First Romance

As always, free-flowing conversations about relationship realities that occur well ahead of time, provide a good foundation for the inevitable ups and downs of a teenager's first romance.  Robert Sternberg, of Yale University,  has done a nice job of discussing seven "types of love", based on various configurations of passion, intimacy and commitment.  Infatuation is one of the types of love he underscores.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with an exciting, fun-filled, thrilling infatuation--as long as everyone involved recognizes it for what it is...and what it isn't.  But no matter what type of love is being experienced, the song still rings true--breaking up is hard to do!

Going through your first heart break is tough depending on how long and serious the relationship is. It just takes time to bounce back onto your feet and socialize again. It would be nice to try to talk to your child, but if he or she doesn't want to engage, then you shouldn't force it. I believe that when the time is right, he or she will decide when it is right to discuss his or her issues.

Sarah, I totally understand your situation. I just want to give you some advice from a young mother. I had my daughter when I was 16 years old, I am not with my daughter's father any more and have not been for several years. My mom tried to tell me that he was not going to stick around, but I said yes he would, he said he loved me and the baby. We broke up right after my daughter was born. It has been hard, but I got through it. The reason I am commenting on your posting is because your mother is only trying to protect you. As a teen you think your parents are your enemies. I'm sure your mom cares for you very much and she is just trying to protect you from all of the horrible things in this world. Don't be angry with her, maybe you can try to talk to her and tell her how you feel. Let her know that you understand her concern and your appreciate her concern, but ask her to try to trust you. As parents, we just don't want anything to happen to our children. We also don't want our children to have to experience the same pain that we experienced as children. We try to stop the cycle. Try to understand that your mom is only being a mom. It is something that mom's do. It is a learning lesson for each of you. I would try to talk to your mom about the situation, maybe she will be understanding. I hope for you and her sake, it will be OK. My daughter is 13 now and she is starting to go through things and I am trying to be understanding with her feelings and situations that she is go through. It is hard as a parent, especially when all you want to do is protect your children. Good luck to you and your sitaution. I wish you the best.

when i had my first romance, it was very tough. i was hurt and maybe, i cried a river. i admit that i had a boyfriend because of curiosity but i know that i had a feeling for the guy. I WAS JUST CURIOUS! i have no idea in having a relationship, so i end up trying it.  i didn't inform my parents about it because i know, they will get mad. if my parents are at my age, i know they'll understand me. because of that experience, i learned a lot. i tried because i didn't know anything about it. if my parents explained it to me, maybe, i didn't search for answers in my own way.  
 
just an advice, the parents should always have time for their children. They should know when to scold and when to listen to them. they should make their child realize that loving is a good feeling that can make them happy. and not the other way around.