One, Two, Tie My Shoe: Common Milestones at a Glance (continued)

• Cutting food - by age 5

Similar to writing, this skill takes a bit of coordination and dexterity. By the end of his fourth year, a child should be able to cut his own food. But again, just giving him a knife and a pizza at five years old and expecting to get a slice out of it likely won't do the trick. He needs plenty of opportunities to practice, and plenty of positive feedback, too.

• Dressing herself (matching not required) - by age 5

Your child getting herself completely dressed is the end goal. But, like reading, this process will be gradual. Your child should begin to aid in dressing in her second year, when she doesn’t quite have the coordination to do the job, but is beginning to help with the process. Typically by five years old, she will be coordinated enough to fully dress, although small buttons and zippers may still require help.

• Tying shoes - between ages 4 and 6.

Unfortunately, many kids have Velcro today and are not familiar with shoelaces. To teach them how to tie with laces, parents again need to demonstrate and provide opportunities for lots of practice. Parents can invest in toys or dolls that are designed to develop bow-tying skills, or simply ease their child into the process with his own two feet, one day at a time.

• The issue of Nighttime Dryness.

Parents often expect their children to be able to learn how to sleep through the night without an accident. But it's not a matter of learning: it’s a physiological development, one that generally occurs between ages 5 and 7. In order to overcome bedwetting, a child’s body must be able to recognize the signs that he has to urinate and compell him awake and into the bathroom. Again, there is a wide range of what constitutes "normal" in this area, so don’t be alarmed if your 7-year-old still wears a nighttime diaper or has accidents. Also, keep in mind that boys usually develop this ability later than girls, and may experience bedwetting problems until a later age.

Although parents may see failure to reach certain developmental milestones "on time" as worrisome, there is no evidence that suggests a child who develops any of these skills later rather than earlier will experience any future learning deficits.  Rather, says Dr. Gouley, this process merely reflects the profound variability in every child's rate of development. So before you go wondering whether your child well ever learn to scrub and spit without swallowing, remember: it's not a race!