Homework, Shmomework
by John Pearson
Did anyone ever really try to use the excuse, "My dog ate my homework?" I never heard anyone use it when I was in school, and I certainly never had a kid try it on me.
At any rate, dogs have better things to eat nowadays, and kids have more imaginative excuses too. Here are the Top 5 I've encountered during my tenure.
1) "My mom/dad/primary caregiver didn't understand how to do it."
Um, that's why your mom/dad/primary caregiver is not getting anything written down in my grade book. I think it's fantastic for parents to show interest in what their child is bringing home and even to offer help if needed. I wish more parents at my school would show such an interest! But the homework is always something similar to what we've practiced in class. The kids never say, "I didn't understand how to do it." They'd much rather blame a family member. Which brings us to number two...
2) "I couldn't do it because my little brother drew on it."
When I hear this excuse, which is thankfully not very often, I always ask to see the homework in question. Usually, there are a few thin pencil lines drawn across the page. Sure, that sort of thing would ruin a Picasso original, but it hardly renders a math worksheet undoable. It's the equivalent of telling someone your car has been totaled when you spill coffee on the passenger seat.
3) "At the Day Care, they don't give us much time to do our homework; we have to go out and play!"
Sometimes those evil Day Care staffers really annoy me. I mean, the nerve! All these kids want to do is finish their homework assignment in a thorough and timely fashion, and these despicable adults are forcing them to play! I can't help but imagine a scene in which an Oliver Twist-like urchin meekly asks, "Please, sir, can I have some more time?"
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Other readers' comments on this article:
Posted by Bob Brown on Dec 18, 2007 3:19 pm
Posted by Phineus on Dec 18, 2007 4:57 pm
The only time I ever tried to give an excuse like that for not having my homework, I used #5 and it worked! I kept muttering "I'm sure it must be here somewhere!" The teacher said I could hand the work in when I found it, (which was not until I actually did it two days later!)
Posted by Almost American on Dec 18, 2007 9:22 pm
Posted by elementaryhistoryteacher on Dec 20, 2007 9:07 pm
AA, you must have had a MUCH more patient teacher than me. :)
Posted by John Pearson on Dec 20, 2007 9:27 pm
He said the teacher didn't believe him the first time he told her the dog ate it, so when the dog ate the replacement page the teacher had given him he refused to tell the teacher what had happened and just took the zero.
This was a 3D assignment that had been left out on the table overnight so it would not be crushed in his backpack.
Sometimes you should give your students the benefit of the doubt.
Posted by bmc on Dec 4, 2008 2:56 pm