It would appear that your child may have an irrational fear of sleeping, showering or bathing alone (or perhaps a very strong preference due to years of habit). Regardless, you may wish to talk with her school counselor who may be able to help her work towards short term goals in order to finally achieve independence with these tasks.
Louise Masin Sattler, NCSP
Nationally Certified School Psychologist
Owner of SigningFamilies.com