My 13 year old has been bullied. The School's "procedure" is flawed. How can we fix it?

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vhiggins asks:

The in place process: complete a form that outlines the bullied, the bully(s), the incident, witnesses. Then the counselor gets involved by gathering all involved together and saying "Stop this action/bullying". This usually does not stop the act(s) but makes the reporter a "tattle tale/baby". I have discussed this process with the counselor, but she says "This is our process". It hasn't helped. Do I go to the principal? If yes, do I involved the counselor in the conversation?

In Topics: School and Academics, My Relationship with my child's school, Bullying and teasing

> 60 days ago

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Boys Town National Hotline

Aug 30, 2009

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What the Expert Says:

It's hard enough on a parent to find out that their child has been bullied, but then to find that the school isn't willing to follow through with helping to end it, is even more frustrating. If you don't feel that the school counselor has helped the situation, the next best step is to talk to the principal. Call and set up a specific time when you can meet with them one on one. Don't just catch them in the hall after school gets out one day.

Before your meeting with them, document everything that has occured, including your attempt at intervention with the school counselor. Also included should be a written description from your child of the of the bullying they've experienced. You're more likely to get a positive response from the principal if your approach toward him is of concern for your child and their bullying policies, rather than accusing him or the counselor of not caring.

After you have talked to the principal give it some time for things to begin to change. If you don't see any measurable change it may be time to take the problem to a higher level such as the superintendant of schools or the school board.

Good Luck!
Boys Town National Hotline
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Additional Answers (2)

dgraab , Parent writes:

Hi, I'm sorry to hear that your child has been bullied, and that you're unsatisfied with the school's response.

Education.com has a special edition focused on bullying that includes articles about how parents and schools can work together to address this very serious issue:
http://www.education.com/topic/school-bullying-teasing/

The special edition also includes practical steps you and your teen can take, as well as links to two free webinars (online seminars) Education offered on this topic, and a free e-book you can share with staff at your child's school:
http://www.education.com/static/ebook/education-com-bullying-ebook.pdf

All of this information is authoritative and comprehensive -- having been compiled, reviewed and/or produced by some of the leading experts on bullying. I hope you find it helpful in resolving the issue you're encountering at your child's school.

> 60 days ago

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stebbinsd writes:

Bypass the system. Get the police involved. If the police will not step in and ARREST that SOB, then sue his parents.

I guarantee you that the school's system will be worth less than the paper its written on if you do this, because they'll be powerless to do jack squat.

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