In my experience its very difficult to "make" a toddler do anything. This is the age of "NO!" afterall.

Of course, we don't "make", we encourage, persuade, coax and motivate. Making any task a fun activity or game young kids can play is a great way to coach a toddler.

Here are some activities that may help in encouraging your preschoooler to read and write.

What to Do
The first activities in the list below work well with younger children. As your child grows older, the later activities let her do more. But keep doing the first ones as long as she enjoys them.

With your toddler sitting with you, print the letters of her name on paper and say each letter as you write it. Make a name sign for her room or other special place. Have her decorate the sign by pasting stickers or drawing on it.
Teach your child "The Alphabet Song" and play games with her using the alphabet. Some alphabet books have songs and games that you can learn together.
Look for educational videos, DVDs, CDs, and TV shows such as "Between the Lions" that feature letter-learning activities for young children. Watch such programs with your child and join in with her on the rhymes and songs.
Place alphabet magnets on your refrigerator or on another smooth, safe metal surface. Ask your child to name the letters she plays with and to say the words she may be trying to spell.
Wherever you are with your child, point out individual letters in signs, billboards, posters, food containers, books, and magazines. When she is 3 to 4 years old, ask her to begin finding and naming some letters.
When your child is between ages 3 and 4, encourage her to spell and write her name. For many children, their names are the first words they write. At first, your child may use just one or two letters for her name (for example, Emily, nicknamed Em, uses the letter M).
Make an alphabet book with your kindergartner. Have her draw pictures (you can help). You can also cut pictures from magazines or use photos. Paste each picture in the book. Help your child to write next to the picture the letter that stands for the object or person in the picture (for example, B for bird, M for milk, and so on).
When you show your child letters and words over and over again, she will identify and use them more easily when learning to read and write.

She will be eager to learn when the letters and words are connected to things that are part of her life.

I'm not an expert but I'll venture this. Pushing at the same spot will make a bruise and create resentment. In anyone! All the people I trust in phonics, for example, always make the point that that when the child resists, you back off, start again another day. Move laterally to other topics and teach them.  Anyway, your child is too young for you to be so obsessive about one thing. The trick is to be just slightly ahead of where a child is--so that the next step looks easy. Float like a butterfly. Besides, the best thing is not to teach but to SHARE YOUR LOVE of something. A song. A poem. A typeface. A name. A hero. A game. A story....
Make your own English perfect. You will soon have to answer grammar questions!

HI I am vira again

thanks to both of you. Especially Windy 1 for such a nice way of explaination. Even I have tried many methods mentioned by you Windy. My son reconises all the alphabates very well but as I mentioned he is some what rluctant to write. But now I have found a new way of making him intrested in writing which i want to ahare with all mothers like me. I have prepared a small sand tub at my home and i tell him to write on it (on wet samd). He really loves it. He makes pictures and even tries to write alphabates on it. I have read about this technique from one of the child's magazine and its really working well. Also i like to admit that my own english is not so good but i am trying on it and i will surely improve on it. Thanks once agian both of you for your advice.

Children at this age are more interested in fun activities, games and anything that amuse them. So they get easily bored doing such things like writing. You should try to do some efforts & give extra time. See which things he like and love to play. So try to starting & sharing time writing those stuffs in colorful manner. With passage of time he would definitely show interest and improve a lot in writing on his own.

Hello,

Your son is 3 years old.  Please dont rush him.  please spend alot of time with him.  if you want him to do something.......give him good encouragement.  Ill tell you what......do you have computer?  You can go www.readingeggs.com  Go check this website out for him...I am sure this will help him out.  I know that he will love it...  Please dont scold him okay.  He just little baby boy.  I know it hard but try this site and see how it go.  It will help him.  Give him alot of encouragement.

Remember that every kids is different individually.  Good luck with the site that I gave you.  Please try it out with your son.  you will see the improvement.

Sincerely,

Bee

Hi there,
I want you to know that you are not alone.  What ever you do, do not scold your son for not being interested.  Encourage him!  My grandson who is 3 1/2 did not have any interest in letters or writing due to someone singing the ABC song with him and then demanding he do it by himself.  He also was given a crayon at age 2 and told to color in the lines and scolded for not doing so.  Since he obviously did not have the skills for either activity, he simply did not want to try.  I began singing the ABC song to him and encouraging him join me.  I also used animal association while reciting the letters and using some physical action to help him associate the letter with the animal, something I learned from a Kindergarten teacher.  This got his attention.  He now loves to sing the alphabet song and knows many of his letters.  To help with the writting skills, we used playdough to build up the muscles and imagination.  This also helped him to realize he can make things with his fingers.  We then moved on to cutting paper, no specific shapes, just cutting it to build those mucles.  He then had the motor skills but didn't want to press hard enough using a pencil or crayon for the marks to show up well.  We started using markers (washable only), using his favorite color first of course.  This makes it exciting to see the colors.  After all this, he was finally interested in coloring and writing.  Now he will color in the lines as much as he can.  He can write his name also.  Another thing I learned from a Kindergarten teacher is to use blank paper, not lined to begin with.  Those lines look great and seem to make sence to us adults, however, they become a road block to kids.  They don't want to try because they may not get it perfect on the lines.

Show your son that you make mistakes sometimes so it will take the heat off of him for trying to make things 'just like mom'.

Hopefully this will help you.  Good luck!

Three year olds need to play! They are learning through the use of their large muscles in preparation for sitting and using their small muscles especially of their hands.  Use play for teaching the letters.  If he loves trains, name the trains and have the beginning letter of the names near each set of trains or have the trains travel to destinations with familar names.  Tape the letter of the destination to the wall for the train to travel to.  Make it fun.  A child must be able to name the letter before they write it. Teach the letter name first. When the child can name the letter, make the letter out of sticks, pipe cleaners, blocks.  When he is able to do this, let him imitate you using very large movements: writing in pudding or shaving creme, painting with a large brush.  Then last and hopefully when he is four, work on paper with a marker or pencil.  A helpful book is: Alphabet Soup: Stirring Your Child's Interest in Letters available at lynaot.com.  Its for 4 to 6 year olds and how to develop letter skills through play. Handwriting Without Tears  (www.hwtears.com) has a wonderful preschool program for writing using wooden sticks, playdought and other fun items.

He will study automatically. Don't worry about that..!! 3 years is a kids playing time.Don't bother about that..!! Automatically he will learn to write and read.

No, I don't think he is slow, children learn at different rates. Keep things fun and motivating and don't scold. Muscles in the hand need strengthening when they are young so try playing with dough, cutting out paper, etc and just general mark making with crayons. It is so important to keep learning fun, if a child feels the learning process is not fun or interesting they won't feel motivated and it will put them off learning. He can still learn the formation of letters through dough, rolling it into long "sausages" and forming that into letters. You can sometimes buy crayons with a triangular cross section that are easier to hold in the correct position. With practice and fun it won't be long before he's got the hang of it.

Hi Vira,
I am from India as well and I completely understand your PAIN. Even my 3 year old, did that, try the good old slate and chalk method, and please use colored chalks. You can also use the magnetic boards and carry that along where ever you go and any time you need to wait bring that board out and play a game of alphabet recognition. Kids love things when you add the word "play."
Another option you can do is get one of those faber castell ole-grip pencil and make him trace standing lines and sleeping lines in a four-lined copy. It worked with my 3 year old.
Finally patience my dear patience.
Wonder why you are teaching numbers till 100? they don't do that until LKG.

There seems to be a big push for schools to get  very young preschoolers to do things that were once taught in Kindergarten!  I thought my son, who is almost 4, would never be interested in learning how to write letters. I exposed him to writing, but I could tell he was just not interested. Just in the last month or two, he has become very interested in learning his letters. We use the TV Teacher program. He now knows how to write many letters. I really think it's because he sees his older brother write all of the time, and he wants to be like him! Don't push too much, he will eventually show an interest!

A young child who struggles with writing will need to practice letter formation using multi-sensory writing strategies to improve motor memory.  They will need to move, touch, feel and manipulate real objects as they learn the habits and skills essential for writing.  Some examples are:
 
 - Have the child first write the letter in the air with two fingers.  Then they can trace over a yellow highlighted letter.  Finally, they can write the modeled and traced letter independently on a whiteboard or piece of paper.

 - Use the wet-dry method.  Children write the letter on a chalkboard with a wet sponge using the correct letter formation.  Afterwards, they dry the letter with a dry sponge using the correct formation.  Then, they rewrite the letter correctly again with a piece of chalk.

 - Build letters out of clay or play dough

 - Use shaving cream to write the letters

 - Trace letters on a piece of sandpaper or a bumpy surface

 - Speak out loud while writing the letters.  For example, speaking through motor sequences, such as "b" is "first comes the bat, then comes the ball."

  - Use different pens and markers that are comfortable and a good fit for your little one.  Sometimes, FAT markers on the white board work best for little fingers and are fun to use.

 Most importantly - make it FUN!  Little writers will only want to write if it is fun for them.  Sing songs, do jumping jacks, cheer out loud, keep it active, lots of high fives, kisses and hugs, and keep it fun!