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ssantanam
ssantanam asks:
Q:

How to make my 4 year old listen?

I have a 4 year old son.I am having a really hard time with him while dropping him off at school.He keeps saying he wants to come home with me and that he misses me.But the moment I leave he is perfectly fine and does have a good time(his teacher also tells the same thing).He doesnt do this much if his dad drops him off.But with me he keeps pulling my shirt or clings to my leg and refuses to leave me.Also while doing any activity at school or at home he is not focussing.He keeps looking in all the directions or keeps talking ,basically does everything to avoid doing that particular work.I had my PTA AND his teacher is also saying the same thing.Making him sit and focus on his activity is getting hard..If I ask him to tell me what number comes after another he is not able to tell me rather he would starting counting from 1 again to tell me the answer.He is able to count in order but not otherwise.I really need some help.

In Topics: School and Academics, Kindergarten readiness
> 60 days ago

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Expert

BMelton
Apr 24, 2012
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What the Expert Says:

You are concerned that your son acts out when you take him to school, and he is distracted from his schoolwork. Children at four years old tend to show some anxiety when transitioning from home to school. When the parent leaves, the child is fine. This is normal but can be disconcerting for the parent. The key is to prepare the child for the transition and describe what you want to see (not what you don't want to see). Make you the transition is quick. Work out the transition with the teacher or staff member. Leave quickly.

Being distracted at home or school is not unusual. The child may be distracted or overstimulated. Neutralize the environment- few distractions. A study carrel works well. Use a cardboard display on a table or desk.

Be very positive about his learning. You want to give him praise for staying on task for 5 minutes. (Set a timer.) You may extend the time incrementally one minute as the child masters each step.  

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Additional Answers (1)

BrendaKayden
BrendaKayden writes:
I had the same trouble with my 4 year old son. I found that some quiet time helped him focus a little better when he had a task to do. Long days at preschool often overstimulate him and it was better to have 10-15 minutes to just sit on the couch and talk about what happened that day. I always asked simple question and left them open ended so he understood that I wanted more than yes or no.

My son also needs to count in order, he remembers songs and poems and just about anything else after only hearing it a couple of times. I started to put numbers out of order so that he needed to search out the answer. He's getting better at the visual aspect of learning. He always gets tons of praise and a treat when he can do a task without straying. I also explained to him exactly what we need to do before we can start dinner, play with our toys...whatever. He needs verbal commands reinforced with visual cues.

It's not perfect but it works for us and it gets better every day!

Good Luck. :)
> 60 days ago

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