Anakalia777
asks:
Q:
How can I help my 4 year old son to write?
My son his 4 years old and seems to be doing great in most things except writing and of course reading. We got tons of different preschool aged writing activity books that focus on tracing dotting lines. He's not so good at getting his line exactly on the dotted lines and when it comes to writing a letter without the dotted lines he completely forgets the technique he's been copying throughout the whole page.
When this happens, he throws his pencil or crayon in frustration, screams and cries, "I can't do it, I can't do it!" I try to encourage him that he's doing a great job or even suggest that we do something else then come back to it later, but he insists on still working it out. When he does and it doesn't go right again we're right back to the same tantrum. I feel like ripping out my hair half of the time. He wants it done correctly and so do I but when it doesn't happen we both get frustrated. What can we do?
In Topics:
Preschool, Helping my child with writing
When this happens, he throws his pencil or crayon in frustration, screams and cries, "I can't do it, I can't do it!" I try to encourage him that he's doing a great job or even suggest that we do something else then come back to it later, but he insists on still working it out. When he does and it doesn't go right again we're right back to the same tantrum. I feel like ripping out my hair half of the time. He wants it done correctly and so do I but when it doesn't happen we both get frustrated. What can we do?
> 60 days ago
What the Expert Says:
Best Answer!
what's this?from a fellow member
Additional Answers (5)
Research has shown that children under five need no formal academic instruction. In fact, children who come from loving homes where the parents often play and have frequent conversations have children who fair very well in Kindergarten. The best indicator if a child will be a good reader and writer is if the parents have books available at home along with being read to. A home where a child who is exposed to books in many different rooms of their home, is more likely to read then the child who is taken to a library. Funny huh? However, this is what the research shows.
The only thing children under five years of age need to be academically prepared, is to be raised in a loving, supportive, book enriched, non-abusive/impoverished environment. A young child's brain and muscle development is still processing at a primitive level, so if formal academics are introduced too early, then there is a possibility of creating a learning disability by forcing nature. Or worse yet, killing their spirit and making them lose their love of learning, which all children are born with. By the time a child turns five they begin to show interest and peaked confidence in using a pencil and paper. School enhances their predetermined skills an helps them to pick up reading and writing fairly quick.
I never taught my son how to hold a pencil or crayon. In fact, he hated pencils. After one week in Kindergarten, he came home took out his pencil can and began to write letters. I was shocked and reaffirmed that we did the right thing by not pushing any formal instruction. ABC magnets on the frig, singing the ABCs, labeling animals and pictures in books was all we really did wit him.
Schools are created to teach children how to read and write. Teachers get their credential to teach children these skills. Parents are here to support and guide. So relax and know in time, academics will come :-)
Children under five should be playing outside, singing, building, creating, painting, experimenting with glue and strings, laughing and getting real dirty.
The only thing children under five years of age need to be academically prepared, is to be raised in a loving, supportive, book enriched, non-abusive/impoverished environment. A young child's brain and muscle development is still processing at a primitive level, so if formal academics are introduced too early, then there is a possibility of creating a learning disability by forcing nature. Or worse yet, killing their spirit and making them lose their love of learning, which all children are born with. By the time a child turns five they begin to show interest and peaked confidence in using a pencil and paper. School enhances their predetermined skills an helps them to pick up reading and writing fairly quick.
I never taught my son how to hold a pencil or crayon. In fact, he hated pencils. After one week in Kindergarten, he came home took out his pencil can and began to write letters. I was shocked and reaffirmed that we did the right thing by not pushing any formal instruction. ABC magnets on the frig, singing the ABCs, labeling animals and pictures in books was all we really did wit him.
Schools are created to teach children how to read and write. Teachers get their credential to teach children these skills. Parents are here to support and guide. So relax and know in time, academics will come :-)
Children under five should be playing outside, singing, building, creating, painting, experimenting with glue and strings, laughing and getting real dirty.
> 60 days ago
He's four. He's clearly not ready. Leave him alone.
Let him play through Starfall.com--he should love that.
I couldn't have kept on the line at four, either. My fine motor skills were horrid. I was a National Merit Scholar, earned a bunch of prestigious scholarships, and was at the top of all my college classes. And my handwriting? Still horrid.
Let him play through Starfall.com--he should love that.
I couldn't have kept on the line at four, either. My fine motor skills were horrid. I was a National Merit Scholar, earned a bunch of prestigious scholarships, and was at the top of all my college classes. And my handwriting? Still horrid.
> 60 days ago
Thanks for all of the advise. I've been trying all of your methods with my son and I'm glad to say it has been work. My son and I are happier than ever and he's learning more than before.
I was being pressured by his preschool teachers about him having to learn how to write his First and Last Name by the time he starts Kindergarten. This is my first and only child so I wasn't familiar with the typical learning milestones of a 4 year old. Based on the advise giving here I see that its not as necessary as the teachers made it out to be. Thank you so much for all of your insight.
I was being pressured by his preschool teachers about him having to learn how to write his First and Last Name by the time he starts Kindergarten. This is my first and only child so I wasn't familiar with the typical learning milestones of a 4 year old. Based on the advise giving here I see that its not as necessary as the teachers made it out to be. Thank you so much for all of your insight.
> 60 days ago
I have a little boy who has a December Birthday and has started Kindergarten at 4.5 years of age. He also struggles a lot with writing on those (insert grownup word here_______) dotted worksheets! Reading all of your suggestions affirms my intuitive hunch that he is just too young and should play in the sandbox instead--but we have to get up to speed so that he can do his homework. Well, what we have done is paint a wall in our house with chalkboard paint--and it has made a big difference! He used to make faint, timid little hairlines on paper that you could only see in real good light--that was our homework. The lines he makes on that lush chalk surface are bold, bright, and fun! I have been gently guiding him to do his assignments on the board--so much easier, and you can laugh and erase the "mistake" lines, or goof them up even more on purpose, write with an eraser, etc. Then we say: ok lets just do it on paper one time for your teacher to see how good you have gotten at this. So far it's been working for us.
> 60 days ago
I am the founder of Pre-K Success and believe all parents want to help their child be prepared for kindergarten. I applaud you for investing the time and interest in trying to prepare your son for school. I have created a play-based fine motor skill kit to help children naturally build fine motor skills, hand-eye coordination, visual motor skills, and most important confidence. It is important for children to practice motor skills at home before entering school. Activity books can be discouraging, and it sounds like the experiences he is having are not helping his self-esteem. There are many fun things your son can do to build necessary small muscles in his hands necessary for writing, along with large motor skill activities he can do at the park that will help build shoulder strength that is necessary before hand strength. For more information I encourage you to check out my web site at www.preksuccess.com and my Facebook page for helpful early childhood development practices.
> 60 days ago
