Tymeister asks:

When a 5-6 year old refuses to go to school, by throwing a fit every day, what does a parent do?

My Grandson throws a fit every day, and wont have anything to do with going to school. He was removed from Kindergarten last year because of his actions not want to get on the bus or go to school. Please help.
In Topics: Discipline and behavior challenges
> 60 days ago



Boys Town National Hotline
Aug 30, 2009
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What the Expert Says:

Just as children have different personalities, they also develop differently, depending on their unique internal genetic clocks and the environment they are in.  The main types of development are physical, cognitive (mental), social and emotional.  All of these are equally important but some are more noticeable such as physical.  

How a child relates to others and gets along in the world is social and emotional development.  These may include feelings of well-being, attachment, and independence.  Just because a child is 5-6 does not mean that he is developed at the same level as other 5-6 year olds.  Remember they all develop differently.

If your child does not relate to the other students or teachers, or feel safe and able to function away from a parent, this may be the cause of his unwillingness to go to school happily.

There is one powerful and simple answer to helping your child develop and that is to spend time with him.  Playing school at home on the weekends will help him feel more comfortable in that environment.  Give instructions like his teacher would give.  Require him to stand in line and walk to another part of the house with hands to himself, just as he would in the school setting.  Make sure he knows his colors, numbers, letters and shapes.  Take a break and play outside for a certain amount of time.  At the end of that time, blow a whistle or ring a bell indicating "recess" is over.  Have him line up, go into the house and wash his hands before the next game.  You could even go to the school grounds and practice getting on a bus and sitting down in a seat.  Talk about what you see on the way to school.  Get him to play along, make it fun.  Play on the playground at school to put him at ease in that setting also.

Going to school is like his "job".  He needs some training to feel prepared to do the job.  

We always suggest consulting with his pediatrician if the behavior continues.  They typically have vast experience with all kinds of "kid problems".

This can be a pleasant experience for him and for the parent.  

Boys Town National Hotline

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