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threekids
threekids asks:
Q:

How can I help my 5th grade daughter to make new friends?

My daughter has always been in the same class with her
BF since 1st grade, now this year they are in different classrooms. She is having a tough time on trying to have conversation with the other girls any suggestions?
In Topics: Self esteem and identity, Bullying and teasing, Friendships and peer relationships
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Boys Town National Hotline
Oct 1, 2010
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What the Expert Says:

Thank you for contacting Education.com!

It is great that your daughter has had a best friend since Kindergarten. It shows that she is able to form a close bond and is a loyal friend. In general, some people are more introverted and are comfortable with having one or two close friends for their entire life. People who are more extroverted like to have several good friends and they are comfortable with making new friends.

Even though it may be a tough transition for your daughter this year, it will be good preparation for when she attends middle school in the 6th or 7th grade, when she will have classes with different kids each class period.

Encourage your daughter to make new friends by suggesting she start the conversation with another girl by giving a compliment such as: "I like your shirt!" or "That was a great answer!" Encourage your daughter to ask the girls questions about themselves like: "What did you do over the weekend?" or "Where did you get those cool shoes?"

Suggest your daughter invite a new friend over after school or over for dinner some night. She could also invite her best friend and they could all get to know one another. Continue to give your daughter praise for reaching out to others but don't push her to make new friends. Over time she will adapt.

If you would like to talk about this or any other parenting issue, please contact our toll-free hotline at: 1-800-448-3000, or e-mail us at: hotline@boystown.org
  
Also, you can give our number and our website for teens to your daughter: www.yourlifeyourvoice.org We are available 24 hours 7 days a week.  
Take care and best wishes to you and your daughter!

Sincerely,

Cynthia, Crisis Counselor
Boys Town National Hotline
1-800-448-3000
hotline@boystown.org





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Additional Answers (5)

knitfreak
knitfreak writes:
threekids,

Believe it or not the fact that your daughter and her BF have been split up is actually good for both of them. It teaches them to open their mind and world to new life stories and ultimatley will expand their friendship circles. At the same time fifth grade can be an awkward stage for most kids. Bottom line, roll play with you can help a great deal. Teach her how to ask open ended questions. For example; Instead of saying "Did you have a nice weekend?" try "So, what did you do this weekend?" Then ask follow up questions. "Oh you played soccer, how far along are you in the soccer season? What position do you play. What does that position do in the game? How long have you been playing soccer?"  The big thing that is out there right now is that people want to be friends and they want you to pursue them. Same for our kids. Other kids want to be friends and they are just waiting for someone to show genuine interest. I'm sure your daughter will do great at open ended questions, and making new friends to add to her BF.
> 60 days ago

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catie
catie writes:
i think that it helps them both learn lessons cause the same thing happened to me. my friend abigail and i are i different classrooms and it taught us a lesson because how are you suppose to meet new people and have conversations in life with other people
> 60 days ago

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magnesiumsulfate
magnesiumsu... , Student writes:
I agree with catie
> 60 days ago

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real-amandabatista
real-amanda... writes:
just tell her to be herself and not to be shy of who she is. when i was in 5th grade i also had a hard time fitting in, but then i noticed i had to be my self and after my class-mates took respect in me.


                                  i wish your daughter lots of luck.
> 60 days ago

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Cherrypie13
Cherrypie13 writes:
This has happened to me once when I was in fifth grade my best friend moved away so for many months I was lonely and I don't want that to happen to your daughter. The easiest way to make friends is to be nice to people. But don't try to hard other wise kids will notice and ignore just let her be herself and eventually she'll find kids with the same interests as her and she can hang out with her best friend as well.
> 60 days ago

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