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Kelly1971
Kelly1971 asks:
Q:

My 5th grade son is overly emotional when it comes to school work.  How can I help him?

He has broken down into tears on several occasions during school and has gotten the attention of the teacher and principal.  He has friends, plays sports and is very considerate of other people's feelings.  However, when it comes time to do something he doesn't understand or perceives to be difficult he breaks down.  He also breaks down when he has forgotten something he needs to turn in at school.  When I try to understand what is going on he doesn't speak freely.  Are there ways to help him?
In Topics: Self esteem and identity
> 60 days ago

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struggling
struggling writes:
I have a 12 year old daughter and we struggled with the same thing. It takes a lot of patience and understanding on your part. It sounds like he is very hard on himself and gets frustrated easily. There are a number of different approaches you could use such as double checking to make sure he has everything that he needs to turn, letting him know that you hear him and understand how frustrated he his...with out prying him to open up....you could always have him see a councelor to see if that might help him. I read a book called "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk" and that was pretty helpful. But I will let you know that it will take a lot of patience and understanding on your part and there is o overnight fix. I hope that helps you atleast a little.
> 60 days ago

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DABrant
DABrant writes:
Possibly he is feeling overwhelmed and may have a learning disability like central auditory processing whereby he might not be able to understand multistep instructions, and it could affect how he processes receptive language and stays focused and on task.  Perhaps he cannot keep up with the rest of the class, is smart and realizes it and then feels bad about it.  It will affect his self esteem and self confidence.  My daughter has this and is in 4th grade. We had frequent meltdowns over homework, school work and just going to school each day. She is a slow processor as a result and we do checklists and frequent check ins with the teacher to stay on top of it. So possibly a checklist of what he needs to take to school each day or bring home each day might help.  Do they have a homework journal - or can the teacher send you a list of the homework that is due each day so you can doublecheck his work each night, or just have the teacher email you the list each day.   It will require some work on your end but in order to help build them up you have to understand where the pressure is coming from - is he in a top reading or math class, maybe ask the teacher to move him down to another level.  Or, the teacher can do some subtle cues to check in with your son while in class to - you probably need a one on one parent teacher conference right away and then visit the guidance counselor, too.  They may have some idea of what can help.
> 60 days ago

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DrVirginia
DrVirginia writes:
It might be a good idea for you to make an appointment to speak with the school's guidance counselor.  Discuss your concerns and ask for suggestions for helping your son.  You did not say if he has had this problem while in other grades.  Hopefully the guidance counselor can meet with him on a regular basis, and as she/he develops a relationship, can give him suggestions on what to do when he gets anxious about schoolwork.  You also may wish to share this information with your pediatrician so that any medical issues can be ruled out.
> 60 days ago

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