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suzannelynn
suzannelynn asks:
Q:

My 8 year old daughter is not sticking up for herself how can I boost her self esteem?

My daughter just confided in me that a boy in her class is punching her. I immediately contacted her teacher and parents got involved. There is other kids in the class that are mean to her to. I can't go after every child. How can I get my daughter to start standing up for herself?
In Topics: Self esteem and identity
> 60 days ago

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aqblickley
aqblickley writes:
Hi suzannelynn,

I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter is having trouble with kids at school. Kids at that age can not only be difficult, but downright mean. It's great that you are taking the issue seriously, and not downplaying it at all to her, the teachers, or fellow parents. Bullying is a very serious problem in schools today, and the first step to preventing and eliminating bullying is to be a proactive and involved parent - and it sounds like you definitely have your bases covered there.

It's important that your child knows that she should not ignore these incidents, and that she realizes how serious they are. Encourage her to always report problems with other kids to you and the teacher.

Empathize with her. Kids who are bullied at school, or who have poor relationships with their peers, often feel like they are alone in the situation. Let her know that no matter what, she has a friend and listener in you.

Try contacting her teacher again, and if that doesn't work, escalate your involvement to the principal and a school counselor (if they have one). This is not a matter to be taken lightly, and part of your job is making sure that nobody downplays the situation.

Help your child come up with strategies to handle the bullying - emotionally and socially. Never encourage physical retaliation. Encourage her to make friends with peers that she does get along with; one of the most effective ways that bullying is eliminated is by getting other kids involved to stick up for her.

Below, I'm including a link to a couple articles that you may find helpful. One goes into more depth about what to do about your child's bullying situation, and the other gives some wonderful ideas for boosting kids' self-esteem.

Hope this helps, and good luck!

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Dr.Monika
Dr.Monika , Child Professional writes:
Parents can help their children to build high self-esteem from a very early age. The simplest ways include: praising your childâs efforts and successes however small, providing warmth and affection, being supportive, showing interest in your childâs activities, using positive enforcement, and being patient when your child learns new skills.


Suggested reading:

Fostering high self-esteem

http://www.pluggedinparents.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=442&Itemid=0

Best regards.
> 60 days ago

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SingleMommy
SingleMommy writes:
One other way is to enroll her in some type of martial arts. It helps build/develop her self-esteem, it helps her defend in situations where she needs to stand up for herself. If the teacher doesn't take action immediately, the principle must be informed. The parents. The bully-kid needs to apologize to her in front of the other kids who witnessed the incident.
> 60 days ago

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hummingbird26
hummingbird26 writes:
put her in karata classes so she learns to protect herself and learn to control her emotions
> 60 days ago

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