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desperateaby13
desperateab... asks:
Q:

Advice for a 2 year old :(

I need some advise about my 2 year old son, ever since i got pregnant with my daughter he's behave started going bad and as time went on it just kept getting worse. my husband and i try asking him nicely to stop doing whatever it is that he isn't suppose to be doing and he just wont listen, scold at him, we take his toys away from him, we put him in time out or send him to his room but nothing works. He sometimes scares me because one minute he is crying to the top of his lungs and with in a second he is like nothing ever happened and a huge smile on his face. I cry out of desperation. we cant go out anywhere with him and no one will baby sit for the same reason! If anyone can help I'd be more than grateful.
    Desperate Aby!
In Topics: My child's growth and development, Discipline and behavior challenges
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Wayne Yankus
Sep 4, 2012
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What the Expert Says:

Dear Desperateaby:

Take heart. This will change.Be firm and consistent with your discipline. Use time out rather than a host of "take aways".  If he cries, ignore him.  Don't let him scare you. he is two years old and this is expected behavior.  Talk to your pediatrician about this for additional suggestions. Be sure everyone is on board--sitters, dad, grandma etc... You will win this one.  Best wishes.

Wayne Yankus, MD, FAAP
expert panelist: pediatrics
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Additional Answers (4)

SHORTLAWANDA
SHORTLAWANDA writes:
It sounds like he wants more of your time and attention. Try noticing when he is doing good at something and then go over the top with praise for it. This will motivate him to do good to get your attention. Also, take mental health days away from him to regain your tolerance for dealing with him. Have your husband babysit one night and you guys take turns. He will grow out of it, I promise. We have three boys that went through this and we have a two year old now. It worked for us. Hope it works for you.
> 60 days ago

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almaf
almaf writes:
Have you tried "catching him being good"? So when you see that he cleaned up his toys without being told or shared with another child, reward good behavior so it is more likely he'll repeat it. Be specific by stating what it is you liked about his behavior and praise and hug/high five or give him a sticker.
> 60 days ago

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Kristinkgr
Kristinkgr writes:
Dear Aby,
My thoughts after reading through your question are these:
Your son is 2.  He has the coping skills of a 2 year old.  And that's exactly as it should be, although it's frustrating and terribly inconvenient for a spell.  
Your child is responding to change in his environment and his awareness that there's a baby on the way.  He can't imagine all the ways that life in his world which is you and your husband and home are going to change.  He just knows that it will and that's throwing him off balance.  
This is a brilliant opportunity for you and your husband to quiet the noise of life for him, focus your energy a bit more to investing in the bonds with your child making him feel assured that though things are always changing, he will always be your priority and he will always be safe and loved.  
Yes, be firm with him and don't shy away from your standard parental discipline.  He wants structure and to know that what he can and cannot do gives him boundaries that make him feel secure.  But set him up for success more so now than ever.  If you can predict an issue before it happens, spend the extra energy to eliminate the possibility and direct his attention to something productive for him and pleasing for you.  The extra effort will be so very worth it.  I promise.
Let me know if any of this helps.
Best wishes to you and your family,
~Kristin
> 60 days ago

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MarlaMiller
MarlaMiller , Teacher, Parent writes:
I have a two year old also.  Her and her younger brother are 15 months apart.  I actually had the same feelings you are having and even worried if my daughter had ASD (autism spectrum disorder). She was showing SEVERAL of the red flags.  I called and got our Early Interventionist involved and let them know my concerns about her behaviors (ours went beyond the mood changes and discipline/behavior issues), she was evaluated and they have started working with her.

Turns out, she has issues with sensory and is a little delayed in her speech even though she is very bright.  We were told by her OT & ST therapist to get through to her, hold both hands and lightly rub the top of her hand while trying to get her to make eye contact.  Once we have her FULL attention, we address the undesired behavior and explain to her (in child like terms) that it is not acceptable and offer a POSITIVE alternative.  

So far....this method is working.  Hope this helps!
> 60 days ago

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