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butterfly212
butterfly212 asks:
Q:

How to approach the teacher and the parent of a child (boy) who continues to hit my child(girl)?

My daughter age 4 1/2 in Pre-K, comes home daily and tells me a boy hits her all the time for no reason. I have a approach the teacher and parent of the child. But it seems to continue to happen. I am extremely upset the teacher never  ever notifies me  and they continue to talk to the parent of the boy who hits my daughter. They only attend for 2 1/2 hrs and I ask the teachers where are they that they do not see this happening. The mother tells me it's because he's jealous of his baby sister. i understand that but it doesn't give the boy the right to hit my child all the time. There is somewhat of a language barrier but there is a translator so I am aware she understands what is going on.
What do I do when I feel I am being ignore and my child is being hurt in school?
    
In Topics: Working with my child's teacher(s), Bullying and teasing
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Boys Town National Hotline
Mar 21, 2012
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What the Expert Says:

We're really glad you're taking the time to reach out for some help on how to handle this situation. It sounds like you took two really good steps by reaching out to your son's teacher and also being willing to speak with the parent of the bully as well. Both of these were really positive and show that you are willing to be proactive and to take the initiative in getting this situation resolved. No parent wants to hear their child is being bullied at school, so its definitely understandable why it would upset you so much.

If speaking with these two people didn't get the results you had hoped for, it would be a good idea to reach out to somebody else. The principal or even the school counselor would be two great people to speak with about what is going on. If the boy's behaviors are out of scope for what the teacher can control, that might be a sign the boy needs some additional help to learn healthier ways to express his feelings towards his new sister than by hitting your daughter. Just because speaking with these two people hasn't gotten things  under control, please don't give up.

Boys Town National Hotline
1-800-448-3000

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Additional Answers (3)

rmauch
rmauch writes:
First of all, I would write it down in a letter for documentation purposes.  It is the teacher's responsibility to keep your daughter safe!  I would make sure the tone of the letter is one of concern, but not threatening.  Make sure you mention the date of your previous contacts on this issue.  Maybe "Mrs. Smith, I am extremely concerned about Molly's safety in class.  On March 2, 2012 I talked with you about Billy continually hitting Molly.  (do not say for no reason, because there is no reason for one child to hit another!).  Unfortunately, the abuse (hitting, issue, matter) continues.  I am very distressed that Molly does not feel safe in class."  You need to document each contact about this issue, take pictures of any bruising caused by this.  Now, I am not trying to be over dramatic, but having a way to prove that your concerns were voiced and what actions you took to handle it is just a good thing to have.  I would even add "Molly really looks up to you or Molly thinks so much of you" so that she gets a visual of your daughter looking up at her for security.  Hope this helps, and good luck!
> 60 days ago

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georgina29
georgina29 writes:
Speak with the principle,then give the superintendent a phone call, till the boy is removed from class,no child should be hurt on school premises purposely,The # is 323  278-3900
> 60 days ago

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sorba
sorba writes:
My nephew was being bullied while he was waiting for the bus stop, my sister even had to go out there and get after the boys one day after they shoved snow in my nephews ears. What she ended up doing is baking a bunch of cookies and taking them over to several of the homes of other kids who were at the bus stop as well. She asked if they would help look after my nephew and make sure that he was not bullied. Since then there has not been a problem with bullying. Perhaps if you were to ask the teacher to talk to some of the children in the class who are more responsible and helpful if they could watch out for bullies and perhaps watch over and protect your daughter, as well as other children int he class that are being bullied as well this may help.  One thing my sister did is include some of those kids who were the bullies in as those who would watch out for my nephew. The teacher could even put this boy in charge. I don't know if this will help, but it has helped with my nephew and it wouldn't hurt to try.
> 60 days ago

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