Behavior in school and at home

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CBrimmer asks:

My daughter used to behave perfectly at school, not so much at home but there wasn't any major cause for complaint. In the last few weeks she has started being disruptive in her class (K5) and will not do anything she is told even if it is something she enjoys doing, lies constantly, whines, and has generally regressed to the level of a spoiled 3 year old (which she never behaved like when she was 3) rather than the nearly 6 year old she is. I've tried time outs, grounding from things she likes, removal of privileges and treats, and loss of allowance. Nothing helps, I try to ask her why and all I get is "I don't want to" or "that's not fun" and the all knowing "I shouldn't have to" I'm at wits end here, and her teachers are not very pleased with her regression. Any suggestions?

In Topics: Children and stress, Discipline and behavior challenges

> 60 days ago

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Expert

Boys Town National Hotline

May 13, 2012

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What the Expert Says:

We're so glad you took the time to reach out today for some help regarding your parenting issue. Seeing your daughter regress and begin to behave in such problematic, defiant ways. We can really see why this would be so frustrating for you as a parent, so you are definitely doing the right thing by reaching out for some support, guidance, and insight.

For a lot of children, a sudden turn towards immature behaviors is very normal. At six years old, your daughter is still learning her boundaries, about the world around her, and how to behave appropriately. Use her current behaviors as a teaching opportunity for you and as a learning opportunity for her. When these behaviors occur, it is important that you address of each of them. This link provides a great link a page that describes a great procedure for addressing problem behaviors: http://www.parenting.org/article/addressing-problem-behavior-effectively.

A sudden change in behavior could also signal that your child has recently gone through an experience that has caused these behaviors. A change in residence, the loss or addition of somebody in her life, and other changes could all serve as triggers for immature behavior. Taking the time to analyze the experiences your daughter has had lately would be a good way to try to answer the question of whether or not she has been through something lately that may have led to these behaviors. If so, it provides you with the opportunity to help your daughter cope with the change and be successful in transitioning through any changes.

Boys Town National Hotline
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Resources:

www.Parenting.org

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