My brother is 15 and i think he is suicidal

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SailorMoon asks:

My brother keeps posting on facebook.com that he wants someone to shoot him or kill him he says that he wishes he were dead I'm afraid he might try to hurt himself his friends have said that hes talked about it but they cant go to the guidance counselors cause the only way they will even try is if my brother goes to them how do i help him when we don't even live in the same state? Is there someone that I can e-mail or call someone that I can talk to? I have also found out from his friends that he smokes weed and ciggarettes and they have tried to talk to him before about the stuff he says but he just gets really angry and defensive and says that they are just out to get him like everyone else can anyone help plz im really worried about him i dont want to lose him we arent real close but i still love him to pieces and i couldnt stand it if something happened to him

In Topics: Teen issues, Depression

> 60 days ago

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Boys Town National Hotline

Feb 16, 2010

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What the Expert Says:

Counselors at the Boys Town National Hotline are available right now to take your call. Please call toll free to 1-800-448-3000 as soon as you are able to talk with someone about your concerns and to map out a plan of action. You are right to be worried and to be seeking help from adults.

You mentioned that your brother’s friends aren’t really willing to go to the guidance counselor at school. Unfortunately, that type of response could merely be validating your brother’s thoughts that no one cares about him. When a person verbalizes thoughts of suicide there is a good chance that that person is actually seeking help. I would encourage you to contact a staff person at the school – either the counselor or the principal. Sharing this information will allow these adults the opportunity to intervene which will send the message to your brother that people do care and that help is available. School staff are required to act on reports of serious thoughts such as what you are describing. More than likely someone from the school would meet with your brother right away to talk about how he is feeling and work with him to find help.

Clearly, this type of information can cause lots of stress for you. As mentioned above, trained counselors are available at the Boys Town National Hotline 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The toll free number is 1-800-448-3000. Please take a minute to call to speak to some who can help you to work through how you are feeling today. A counselor at the Hotline can provide you with support and encouragement you need and can help you to map out additional steps you can take to help yourself and your brother deal with this situation. In addition to the counseling that will be offered, whoever you talk to can also search a database to determine if there might be agencies in your brother’s local area.

If you speak to your brother again, please give him the toll free number of 1-800-448-3000 for the Boys Town Hotline. In addition to calling, he can also send emails to counselors at Boys Town. The email address is hotline@boystown.org. Lastly, since your brother has access to the internet, encourage him to seek help at www.yourlifeyourvoice.org. This Boys Town website is designed to help teens find ways to work through tough feelings and circumstances. Your brother needs to know that there is help available to him.

One last thing to know is that you can always contact the authorities in your brother's local area if you learn that he has a plan for suicide or if he has already done something to harm himself. Every county has personnel trained to respond to suicidal people in the community. Do not hesitate to contact your local police for help in contacting his local police. The Boys Town Hotline can also assist you to find the number for the police in your brother's local area.

Continue to make noise about your brother's suicidal references to everyone who will listen. Contact other members of your family and contact friends that might be willing to help. Send your brother the message that people care and are there to provide support and encouragment. Follow through with the Boys Town National Hotline at 1-800-448-3000 as soon as you are able to call.

Thank you for writing to www.education.com.

Linda, Counselor
Boys Town National Hotline
1-800-448-3000

Resources:

www.yourlifeyourvoice.org

www.boystown.org

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Additional Answers (4)

dgraab , Parent writes:

Hello, I'm very sorry to hear about your brother's situation. Please call his parents or legal guardian immediately. He needs professional help, and I strongly urge you and his parents/guardian to talk to a doctor or mental health professional about his condition immediately. Please call 911 (or the local police department in his town) if he is currently expressing that he will kill or harm himself.

Boys Town National Hotline is another resource (in addition to those above) that you or your brother can call to talk to someone immediately: 1-800-448-3000.

> 60 days ago

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SailorMoon writes:

my mom already knows but me and her live in louisiana my grandmother is the one who has custody of him but she wont do anything cause shes afraid it will look bad on her

> 60 days ago

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parpamom writes:

SailorMoon, Don't stay quiet. Let him know that you're worried. Depression is something most people are afraid to talk about because society has made it something to be ashamed of. It's an illness like any other. That will be hard for your brother and probably parents to understand but I'm afraid too many people think it will just go away until it's too late. I know cause I've watched my son for the last 12 years, afraid like you that he might kill himself. Thankfully we've gotten to where we talk opening about it. There are many types of depression but it sounds like your brother needs help. For his sake and yours don't react too late. I don't know what relationship you have with your parents but I think they need to know. Maybe even show them his facebook page. I can't stress how important it is that you not just wait thinking it'll pass, maybe it will, but maybe it won't. Good luck!

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jessie205 writes:

When my brother was that age he was doing the same thing and he thought that everyone was against him and he would talk about killing himself and he smoked weed and took pills to blend in with his so called friends, because of that he went down quick then it came down to it and I just told him either I could help him or we was going to take him to get help. There's always a reason that boys and girls between the ages of 12-18 go through things like this and it's a social thing or they think that they don't fit in and if they do these things evverything else will be great and they'll have lots of friends and things will be just great but they do not realize that it's only making things worse for them by doing these harmfull drugs and or threatening to harm theirself, if you can't get through to him maybe there's a counciler at the school someone can talk to because if something does happen to him what will people think about the ones that didn't help him or offer to help because of the embarressment they would be put through? I think that he should be a number 1 Prioroty to everyone until he can get back straightened out again with his life.

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