I've been bullied since I was 5 years old. I've been called a [bad names: question edited by Education.com Community Team]. I've been cyber bullied 1 time. They told me that I should of starved myself to death cause no one cares about me. They also told a lot of my friends that I'm using them and that I hated them. Some of them believed them. I'm getting pushed into walls and they pretend to hit me. I actually got hit once...today after I got pushed into the wall again I sat in a corner of the bathroom and I cried and cried and cried. When I tell the school all they do is talk to them. The people who bully me don't get into trouble. How is this fair to me! I'm scared to go to school, I'm scared to go into a bathroom at school I'm scared to be alone in the school. Someone please help me.
This happens to me all the time. I've learned (because I was afraid to tell an authoritative figure) to just deal with it. You, however, DO NOT have to settle for this. It is wrong, sick and you have the right to a peaceful and not disruptive education.
Please, please tell a nice teacher or go straight to your principle. Say you're not comfortable with giving names if you're not. You can also tell a parent and have them alert the principle for you.
I am so sorry for what they are doing to you. Have you told your parents? Do you have a school officer? Have you told them? If your parents, for some reason won't help, you can make the report. you can call your local sheriffs dept and tell them what's going on (make sure you tell them the school won't help you and the kids have been harassing you since you were five). They will guide you through what you need to do. You don't have to wait for the school to decide to take your abuse seriously. You can press charges on them yourself. Don't wait. Do this today!! You don't deserve to be abused. If you need my help, I am here for you. I am a parent of a fourteen year old girl. She has been bullied as well. Hang in there.
Phoenix, why aren't you talking to your parents and the teachers at school? This is very dangerous for you. Always remember that you are none of those names. Bullies attack others to make them feel better about themselves.
Be proactive; start a club that addresses bullying and make your club a "Bully Free Zone". You are not alone; they are others in your school that are bullied too. Make friends with them. Ask them to help you form your club. Help make the bullies 'not cool'.
Best of luck, Trish
Have you gotten your parents involved? You'd be surprised what teachers do when parents step in. Warn your friends about the lies these bullies spread, so they have no doubt of your friendship. If they still believe the lies being told, they are not worth your time. True friends will always stand by you.
You have to remember, these people are trying to make themselves feel better by putting you down. Don't believe anything they say, you have just as much right to be on this earth as they do. You have the right to feel safe and feel respected as they think they do. Take some defense classes and give back what they give. These idiots will continue to harass you as long as they think you won't retaliate.
Know that you are a better person than every one of them.
Good luck :)
I can't tell you how to change other people. They have to be into that themselves. I am sorry you have had to go through this. There are people that can't feel good about themselves so they take it out on others.
But here is what you can do, to help yourself. Listen to your self-talk, what you say to yourself, when no one is around. Dismiss those thoughts of I must not be a good person, I am unlovable, I am a nothing. Send them out the door.
The truth is we are all very special, different, unique individuals. You are special. You are loved, always by your creator. You need to realize you have many strengths and your weaknesses aren't the end.
Tell yourself the truth. " I matter! I am someone unique and wonderfully made, no accident about it." "I can be loved and share love". The do just that with others through friendship, kind acts to others around you. Find someone who can affirm you and "fill your bucket" with good things, then turn around and fill someone else's. You can only change yourself. Sometimes the change that we need lies within ourselves and our thinking.
As far as feeling safe, you need to talk to someone in the school. Is your family aware of what is going on?
Get help from family, pastor, school counselor. Someone needs to go through this with you.
I am so sorry to hear that you are dealing with this issue. My heart goes out to you. I used to work for SchoolTipline and I would always hear stories like this.
Please, do tell your parents. They want to help and can help more than you realize.
Here are some other helpful tips:
If you are being bullied here are some things you should do:
Talk to someone you trust, such as a teacher, parent, older relative or friend.
Be persistent. If the first person you talk to doesn't help don't give up. Speak to someone else.
If you can, write down everything that has been said or done to hurt you. Try to write down how you feel. When you have found someone you can trust, discuss what you have written with that person. Be careful only to write down things that have really happened.
Ask the person you talk to not to do anything without telling you about it first. You have a right to know what is being done on your behalf and to say whether you think it is a good idea or not.
If you find it difficult to talk to an adult, ask one of your friends to come with you, or ask someone to talk to an adult on your behalf.
You could telephone ChildLine (Freephone 0800 44 1111). Their helpers provide a confidential counselling service for young people in trouble or danger.
Most importantly, do something. Sometimes bullying stops quickly, but doing nothing means it may continue until someone is seriously upset or hurt. That could be you, or the bullies may find someone else to pick on. If their behaviour is not challenged they are unlikely to stop.
Here are some things you should not do:
Don't try to deal with the problem on your own. There is nothing wrong with asking for help.
Don't hit the people who are bullying you. You might end up being accused of bullying yourself.
Always tell the truth about what has happened. Don't exaggerate. If a small part of what you are saying is shown to be untrue then it throws everything else into doubt.
Don't hide what is happening from the adults you trust. Keeping things secret is the bullies' biggest weapon. That is why they go to so much trouble to stop you telling.
You are a beautiful person no matter what anyone says. As long as you can find it in your heart to love yourself that's all that matters. Make sure that parents/friends and teachers are aware because bullying is a serious problem and those individuals will be handled accordingly. I was once bullied and I found other things to occupy my time, such as sports and extracurricular activities. The main thing is to love yourself. There will always be people who are jealous of you.
I'm a teacher in a very tough school in a high poverty area. Believe me Phoenix1212, bullying is driving us teachers crazy too. I am very tough when I see or even am told about someone bullying someone. I don't talk, I scream, I threaten, I make the bully see what it's like not having anyone on your side. You need to stand up for yourself and find out who can help you. Someone in your school can and will help you. Report what you have to the Principal and tell him or her that you are recording it to show that you have asked for help. Too many children today are falling prey to bullies. I found a phone number to use for help, please use it. 1-800-4-A-Child. Be well, for all that is stupid and ugly and painful will be behind you one day. You must be strong! PLEASE!
Thank you for reaching out for help, and my heart and thoughts absolutely go out to you. While you've taken a great first step by reaching out for advice, an online community forum cannot provide all of the help and guidance that you deserve.
Nobody deserves to be treated this way. Please, please, please talk to a trusted adult (parent, teacher, guidance counselor) immediately and let someone know what is going on.
I've included a link in the Resources section below to a list of ways to get help with bullying. And if you ever feel like your life is in immediate danger, please call 911 immediately.
You know, that happened to me once and what I did was that I stood up for myself. You should do that but first, have you talked to your mom because that is the most important thing you have to do. The first time you're being bullied. Trust me, talk to your mom! If you already did, awesome, but if she doesn't anything talk to someone special.
Cyber bullied? Physical bullied? Man, those are some SERIOUSLY mean things to do. I don't blame you for crying at all. Here's my suggestion, if it's not physical, just simply ignore them. I've been called a geek and a lot of other names too at school. But I've just let them roll off, knowing that I'm not a geek or nerd or wimp, just knowing that I am who I am, and getting on with life. And here's my suggestion for physical bullying, tell a parent. For physical bullying, there's nothing else I can tell you.
In my earlier answer I forgot to answer 1 question about physical bullying. Maybe you should learn self-defense (karate, kung-fu, ju-jitsu) stuff like that. Whether you choose that as one or your only path to stop physical bullying, I wish you good luck.
Try telling your parents, if they don't seem to care, which I doubt will happen, tell a teacher, if they don't seem to care, which I also doubt will happen, tell the principal, he/she I can almost GUARANTEE will care. As for cyber bullying, that is NOT true. Why would I be giving you suggestions if I didn't care about you and your well-being?
Best of wishes Phoenix, AJBlum
p.s. I've also added this website for reference.