johnM
asks:
Q:
Our daughter does not want to have play dates - any ideas?
My daughter is four years old and we have started noticing for the past few months that she does not want any kids to come to our home. She does go to their house and plays well. whenever we plan to invite anybody and if they have kids she starts screaming that do not invite.
In Topics:
Friendships and peer relationships
> 60 days ago
What the Expert Says:
Additional Answers (2)
In past she used to initiate to invite friends at house. So far we think she does not like any toy that makes noise. As soon we start talking to invite somebody to our home she starts crying and her face becomes blue.
In nutshell she is very friendly with all of her friends at their house or in the pre-school. Also she does not have any problem when we invite only adults.
In nutshell she is very friendly with all of her friends at their house or in the pre-school. Also she does not have any problem when we invite only adults.
> 60 days ago
Hi John,
Well the plot thickens! It is still somewhat unclear whether your daughter is suffering from a fear or some sort of concern about sharing her things with peers. Given that she doesn't mind having adults over (not much threat that they will take her toys!), my guess is that she is somewhat protective of her toys. Perhaps she fears that one of her friends will break her toys? Take her toys?
Regardless, I think that you should do your best to slowly expose her to situations in which friends are over in "small doses". Perhaps you and your wife could schedule a playdate in which a friend comes over for about a half an hour and then you take them to the park or a children's museum. Schedule a couple of playdates like that, slowly extending the amount of time that friends are actually at the house. Once she becomes more comfortable with having friends over and sees that it can be fun and enjoyable, I anticipate that she will be more open to having friends over for long periods in the future.
Let us know how it goes!
Well the plot thickens! It is still somewhat unclear whether your daughter is suffering from a fear or some sort of concern about sharing her things with peers. Given that she doesn't mind having adults over (not much threat that they will take her toys!), my guess is that she is somewhat protective of her toys. Perhaps she fears that one of her friends will break her toys? Take her toys?
Regardless, I think that you should do your best to slowly expose her to situations in which friends are over in "small doses". Perhaps you and your wife could schedule a playdate in which a friend comes over for about a half an hour and then you take them to the park or a children's museum. Schedule a couple of playdates like that, slowly extending the amount of time that friends are actually at the house. Once she becomes more comfortable with having friends over and sees that it can be fun and enjoyable, I anticipate that she will be more open to having friends over for long periods in the future.
Let us know how it goes!
> 60 days ago
Other Similar Questions
- how do I get my Super sensitive 6yr old daughter to be more assertive and less timid?
- I am con fused !
- Cameron, my Apsie girl is 16 yrs old, in 10th grade. She needs more social opportunities. Do you have any suggestions? We have tried the obvious.
- Can you help me with a "copying" issue?
- What to do when daughter is teased at school and has no friends?
- WILL I GET ATTENTION FROM OTHER KIDS SINCE I AM NEW IN THIS COUNTRY??
- how do you know that your children has Autism?
- what are the advantages of peer groups influence?
- Can we get all these lonely 12 year olds together?
- i am always trying to play school with my sister in second grade.she doesnt play because she thinks it it too boring.does anyone have any ideas on how
