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tsmith721
tsmith721 asks:
Q:

Daughter won't go to school

My daughter, almost 13 is refusing on a regular basis to not go to school.  She has had medical test after medical test for stomach issues which she claims she has but the doctors have found nothing and say that when she complains about stomach issues to give her Motrin or Tylenol and she needs to go to school.  There is no medical reason why she needs to stay home and not attend school.  I am a divorced father and on the weekends she goes to her mother's and after a weekend with her she refuses to come home and go to school the following week.  I am at my wits end as to how to handle this.  I get no support from her mother who's attitude is to let her stay home because she doesn't want to fight with her.
In Topics: School and Academics, Working with school administrators, Discipline and behavior challenges
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Dr.Monika
Jan 24, 2013
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What the Expert Says:

Sorry to hear about your parenting struggles...  It is not easy to deal with teens.

Since your daughter's health care provider already ruled out a medical problem, you can sleep assured that your daughter's physical health is not in jeopardy.

How is your daughter's attitude/mood overall?  Does she seem depressed? Angry?  Moody?  Does she cry a lot?

There is a very strong connection between the body and the mind.  Therefore, people who are depressed or simply stressed out often exhibit somatic symptoms, such as headaches, abdominal pain, etc.

What is going on at your daughter's mom's house that affects your daughter so much?  Is there something going on at school that makes her not want to go there?  Is somebody bullying her?

I think that both of you, you and your daughter, should sit down and have an open discussion about what's going on.  Your daughter needs to know that you will be there for her no matter what.  

Consider talking to the principal/teachers to get an insight about what might be going on at school.  And last, but not least, consider an evaluation with pediatric therapist.  Your daughter's regular health care provider will be able to recommend one in your area.

Best regards.
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Additional Answers (1)

mommichele
mommichele writes:
Tough situation. Middle/Jr. High can be very difficult for kids. Their peers at this age can be relentless. Talk to the school and her teachers to see if maybe something is going on at school. Get her involved in positive activities at school. Meet with the guidance counselor and make a plan. Try getting her involved in the local church youth group, youth pastors are usually a wonderful asset when dealing with teen behavior and challenges. Hope this helps a lil. Praying for you and your daughter.
> 60 days ago

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