I recently opened a home-based daycare and although I have been watching children since I was nine years old, I was not quite prepared for the four year old who enrolled back in May, 2011. I have mostly boys enrolled in my daycare and one little two year old girl. I love kids and actually have a blast with them. They are a kick and so eager to learn and do the right thing. However, my four year old boy continually poops his pants at random. Sometimes 3-4 times a day. It does not matter how many times per day I ask him if he needs to go, he will tell me no and poop his pants anyway. He really becomes defiant when he does not get his way and will kick, hit and scream. He is nice when he wants to be and not when he doesn't feel like it. He takes my son's toys simply because he wants them and fails to recognize that it is not ok to take things that are not his. He refuses to eat meals that I make for the other children and expects me to make him something different. He will hit and push the other kids if he does not get his way and if they get any attention, he gets really upset. I just don't know what I should do. His mom doesn't like it when I tell her that he is bratty during the day. She is offended. Please help!
I see that you are experiencing some significant issues, therefore you may wish to avail yourself of area behavior management courses offered through a local department for children's services (if there is one in your area).
These sites also may prove to be helpful for you to learn about behavior management when there are tough kid situations: