how do i explain to my two friends that they shouldnt date?

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forevachris... asks:

I have two friends who recently started talking on IM's but they have never met before. they have now claimed they like each other and are wanting to date but the problem is that they are both in boarding school. she boards in his hometown and he boards in another city so when he comes home so does she. i really disagree with what they are wanting to do and i have said it numerous times but the just wont listen...

In Topics: Teen sexuality and dating

> 60 days ago

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Expert

Boys Town National Hotline

Sep 2, 2011

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What the Expert Says:

Hello and thanks for reaching out!

Unfortunately your friends are the only ones who can make their own decisions. As is goes with most life experiences, people have to go through it themselves to learn and grow. You are wise to suggest they not start a relationship online but it sounds like they are not ready to take this advice. On the other hand, if you have reason to believe either of them are in a harmful or dangerous situation and if they are minors, you should talk with their parents about your concerns.

You can also give our Hotline number and website to your friends. We are here 24 hours to listen and help teens and young adults through any problem.

Thanks for being such a good friend! Take care and best wishes to you and your friends.

Sincerely,

Cynthia, Counselor
Boys Town National Hotline
1-800-448-3000
yourlifeyourvoice@boystown.org

Resources:

www.yourlifeyourvoice.org

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Additional Answers (1)

JeanneBrock... writes:

It is great that you are concerned about your friends. But this doesn't seem like a situation where a friend should be telling other friends what to do, at least based on the information you provided. It can be hard to watch friends get into situations that you think will be difficult. But sometimes people just need to find their own way and if you push your ideas on them, then you might risk losing friendships. So I'd advise taking a step back and just being available if either of them wants to talk.

Jeanne H. Brockmyer, Ph. D.
education.com expert clinical child psychologist

> 60 days ago

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