How can I explain to my parents that a social life is important to adolescent development?
I am 17 and live with my father and little brother. i am to the point where i want independence, and I am about to go to college. My father guilt trips me every time I want to go out with friends, or be out of the house. he tells me that other teens(who arent me friends) dont go out any more than once a week or so. How can I show or explain to him that it is a part of a teens development to be social? is ther a website or pamphlet i could give him? thank You.
It sounds like your father loves you very much and is protective of you. He may have come from a cultural background or family where teenagers were not given much freedom and friends were not as meaningful. There is always a happy medium to balance time with family and friends.
Here at Boys Town, we help parents and teens with many different issues. You can check out our websites and look through our online catalog for resources which may help you talk with your father. We also have a website just for teens: www.yourlifeyourvoice.org From this site you can e-mail a counselor and we also offer the option of a live chat with a counselor Monday thru Thursday nights from 8-11pm, Central Time. Our websites are all listed below.
Your father can also call our Hotline and speak with a counselor any time. We are here 24 hours, 7 days a week. We can send parenting brochures to him in the mail if he does not go on the computer.
We are so glad that you are reaching out. Take care and best wishes to you and your family!
Cynthia, Crisis Counselor
Boys Town National Hotline
First, you need to focus on your studies, by reading your question English may be a great place for you to start. Second, I am assuming that you attend school full time, hold a job, provide your own transportation and can pay for your expenses. If that is the case and you are responsible and have proven yourself then yes, you should be allowed some social freedom. If you are still 100% reliable on your father, then you are not mature enough to make decisions for yourself and it is your father's place to set guidelines for you. Even, if you begin to become social or date, you should still follow the rules that your father has placed and a curfew should be set. Although, you feel as though you are mature and ready for your social freedom, you may not be, and your father knows best. Good luck!