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tangyberry
tangyberry asks:
Q:

i once liked this guy but he didnt like me back and now he and his friends always make fun of me about it i am sick and tired of it what can i do

i am in high school and this happened this year and i wasnt the one to tell him
In Topics: Friendships and peer relationships, Teen sexuality and dating
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Boys Town National Hotline
Jul 21, 2011
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What the Expert Says:

This sounds like a very difficult situation.  We can understand why this situation would be so upsetting for you.  What makes situations like this, and any bullying situation really, so difficult is that they are complicated and there are no sure fire answers to try to get the bullying to stop.  There are a number of things you can try, such as...

-Ignore them so they don't see any reaction from you
-Avoid them
-See if you can talk to a friend of theirs who could talk to them about leaving you alone
-Ask or tell them to leave you alone
-Get a friend to stand up for you while it is happening
-Make a joke out of it with them
-Kill them with kindness

But none of these are guaranteed to work.  That does not mean, however, that they are not worth trying.  One part of bullying that is important in bullying, however, is reporting.  We hope you can report what is happening to somebody at your high school.  Not so that they can turn around and immediately get these guys in trouble, just so that they can problems solve with you, have staff keep an eye out for it and intervene when it happens, and make sure the school is set up in the safest way possible for all students.  If you can tell them when you report when and where it happens the most often, that can be helpful because maybe they could help by just putting a teacher there or changing a seating arrangement if it is in a classroom or something.  Please let somebody know, it can also be nice just to get it off of your chest.

Which leads to the next important thing to do.  Find ways and places to give yourself an escape from the bullying.  Coping with bullying in healthy ways is just as important as trying to prevent and intervene in bullying situations.  It will be easier to cope with bullying if you can find a place where you feel safe, happy, and like you belong.  Whether it is a sports team, a church group, a part time job, volunteering at an animal shelter, whatever, it will be helpful for you to find and hold onto a supportive and helpful group of people or friends.  The more good times you can create for yourself, the easier it will be to deal with the bad.  Identify your interests, explore and develop those interests, and try to do so in a social way!  

Good luck!

Counselor, Dominic
Boys Town National Hotline
1-800-448-3000
A 24 hour hotline for teens and parents
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Additional Answers (2)

sharkfunky
sharkfunky writes:
listen ive had this happen to me were i liked this girl and theses guys started making rumors about me and i can help just if you school has crime stoppers go to them and report them and if doesnt stop just continue to report them until they stop thats what helped me
> 60 days ago

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sharkfunky
sharkfunky writes:
-Ignore them so they don't see any reaction from you
-Avoid them
-See if you can talk to a friend of theirs who could talk to them about leaving you alone
-Ask or tell them to leave you alone
-Get a friend to stand up for you while it is happening
-Make a joke out of it with them
-Kill them with kindness

these things are what helped me when this situation came up
> 60 days ago

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