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Jiff
Jiff , Student asks:
Q:

What do I do when someone I hate is being bullied? What do I do when someone I like is bullying someone else?

Bullying and teasing
In Topics: Bullying and teasing
> 60 days ago

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Expert

AnnieFox
Jan 3, 2013
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What the Expert Says:

Great questions, Jill! I've been working on bullying issues for a really long time, and there's something very special in the way you've been thinking about this stuff that I have not seen before. I'm impressed!

When someone you "hate" is being bullied, there might be a part of you that is a little bit glad. It's the same part of us that watches a movie and cheers (inside) when someone stands up to the "bad guy." I understand that feeling of "Yeah, you just got what you deserve!" However, in real life, when we cheer (or just stand and watch) when someone (even people we don't like) is being bullied, we are part of the problem. I know, I know, you're not a bully. And you would never be mean to someone. But when you see someone (anyone) being bullied, you have to be one of the "good guys." That's the only way to make sure there is less bullying in the world. What do you do in that moment? Well, you could speak out and say, "Leave him/her alone!" Or you could get help from an adult. Or you could go over to the person being bullied and say, "Let's get out of here." and then walk with the person to safety. That would be the right thing to do. Anything less than helping the person in trouble, ADDS to the problem of bullying.

As for your other question, "What do I do when someone I like is bullying someone else?" Once again, standing by silently and letting it happen only ADDS to what I call "social garbage." If you want LESS social garbage in your school, then you've got to speak out. Tell this person you like, "Leave him/her alone." or "Hey, that's mean!" Because you like this person (and maybe s/he is actually a friend of yours) then it's going to be much easier to talk with him/her about what they were doing and how it made you feel.

We can't change anyone else's behavior... can't make anyone DO something or STOP DOING something. But we can also try to do the right thing ourselves. Speaking up and defending someone is always the right thing to do.

I hope this helps.
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JamielaIsmail
Jan 1, 2013
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Best Answer!

what's this?
from a fellow member
Dear Jiff,
Irrespective of whether you like or dislike the persons, BULLYING SHOULD BE REPORTED.  That is the right thing to do.  So please tell a teacher or their parents what is happening and help those 2 children and by stopping the bullies, you will be helping many others who are being bullied.

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Additional Answers (3)

kawikasmith
kawikasmith writes:
Well you help the person you hate and go tell the parents of the person you like and the person he or she is bullying. Also tell the principal,teacher, or even counselor.
> 60 days ago

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goreyo
goreyo writes:
Well you don't want to tell on the person you like because he or she would probably stop talking to you or something. Just simply tell them that they are bullying and it is not nice.
> 60 days ago

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MomSOS
MomSOS , Child Professional, Caregiver, Parent writes:
Bullying is wrong regardless of who you like and who you do not like.

In all situations it is correct to stay out of the bullying yourself, even if the person being bullied is someone you do not like.
Tell the bully that what they are doing is unacceptable.
Get help if you are in a situation where the bully is unwilling to stop.
Report the bully to the authorities if in a school setting. Reporting is a safety issue--it is NOT tattling!
If there is a safety issue on the street, call police if you can get to a phone.

Bullying is always wrong.

Bette J. Freedson, LICSW, LCSW, CGP
> 60 days ago

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