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melissa_connell
melissa_con... asks:
Q:

My three kids are having issues listening! Help!!!

My twin boys are 5 and their younger sister is 4. A little over 2 years ago, their dad walked out on us and their behavior has gone crazy.
All three kids are potty trained, but the boys (more than their sister) have started having multiple accidents a day.
When something upsets them, they will scream, throw things and hit their siblings.
They no longer share their toys and when they're at home, they are constantly into things that they know better than to play with, writing on walls, throwing food products. Sometimes they even spit on the floor or outright pee and poop on the floor.
And when they're spoken to, they don't even attempt to acknowledge whoever is speaking to them... ESPECIALLY me.
I AM LOSING MY MIND! PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!!! Thanks!
In Topics: Discipline and behavior challenges
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Dr.Monika
Jan 24, 2013
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What the Expert Says:

Sorry to hear about your kids' behavioral problems!  It is not easy to be a single parent, and especially when the children act out.  

Parental separation is tough on every family member.  Kids might take it even harder than adults though because they can't comprehend the whole situation.  Sounds like you need to contact a pediatric therapist as soon as possible to get your sanity back!  Your kids' regular health care provider will be able to refer you to a pediatric therapist in your area.  Also, do not forget about yourself.  The stress of losing a spouse makes you vulnerable to the effects of stress.  Consider seeing a therapist yourself.

Best regards.
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Additional Answers (2)

Jiff
Jiff , Student writes:
You guys sound like you could use a good, professional counselor.
> 60 days ago

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JamielaIsmail
JamielaIsmail , Teacher writes:
Yes, I agree that family therapy is needed. However, you can try to play them up against each other in the sense that they would be rewarded for good behavior.  Explain to them how you feel when they act out.  Set out a behavior chart with some routine activities and inform them that the first one who gets full stars gets a toy/prize of their choice (within in a budget).  Daily rewards for not peeing and pooping and weekly rewards for following the routine and monthly treats of going to the movies if all their tasks are done.  Try to do something fun with your daughter so that the twins will want to join in and share that fun.  Do things together.  I once threw a tantrum and my son's reaction to the onlooker was - she's no relation - this shocked him and he started behaving!
Good luck.
> 60 days ago

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