irishmans_l... asks:

Can I overrule my child's school if i don't agree that the punishment fits the crime?

my son was suspended for 3weeks and giving a citation for disorderly conduct (by campus police--rent-a-cop IMHO) for saying an expletive (edited by site moderator) while having a private low volume conversation with a friend and was overhead by nearby teacher i don't think that this was a fair punishment 2weeks tops maybe BUT NO CITATION >: can i overrule the school I'M HIS PARENT NOT THEM I SHOULD HAVE FINAL SAY!
In Topics: Discipline and behavior challenges
> 60 days ago



Oct 27, 2010
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What the Expert Says:

Whether or not a parent can overrule a school will depend to a degree on the school's policies and whether a parent wants to go so far as to get legal advice.

What I recommend in this case is that you contact the school administrators and find out what the policies are.  You have every right as a parent to voice your concerns, your disagreement, and your wish to have this determination changed.

In any case, whether you succeed in overruling the school or not, you might want to see if something positive can come out of this for your child.  Maybe there is something to be gained in some way from this experience.  Maybe it is about learning how a person advocates for what he/she believes is right. Or, maybe there is something else he could gain from this, that you as the parent will help him to see.

In any case, it is certainly your right to address this situation, get all the facts, and info and make a decision about how far you want to go to pursue your final say.

I hope you will let us know how you fare with this.  It is an interesting situation.

Bette J. Freedson, LICSW, LCSW, CGP
Clinical Social Worker
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Additional Answers (1)

MTrejo writes:
I understand that you are quite upset at the school for issuing the suspension.  Here are some of my thoughts.  If you have not done so already, ask the school staff to give you a copy of the rule/discipline manual.  All schools have one.  Read it and see what it says about the consequences of using fowl language on school grounds.  Also, when teacher reprimand children, they usually consider several things: 1) was this the first time that the student used bad language, 2) did he used it in a threatening manner, 3) how were other students affected, embarrassed, concerned, 4) was the student previously warned not to used bad manners, and so on.  Your son should also answer some of these questions for you.  Whatever you find out, please be aware that the school does have the right to enforce strict discipline when the staff believes that it is necessary for the safety and well-being of all other students. However, parents also have the right to appeal suspensions or to have full explanations for the type of suspensions given.
> 60 days ago

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