I am in a treatment facility and another resident forced me to perform oral sex on him on three different occasions in the last month and a half. I have talked to a detective in the special crimes unit but not sure whether or not to prosecute b/c of fear of retaliation. What should i do?
First of all, you should be very proud of yourself for reaching out for help! It takes a lot of courage to come forward when something horrible happens to you. Good for you for talking to a detective and we hope you will prosecute. What happened/is happening to you should not be going on. You deserve to feel safe, especially in a treatment facility. This resident should be held accountable for his actions and the only way that can happen is for you to press charges. Please trust the detective will do their part in making sure no retaliation happens to you. Be sure to voice these concerns to the detective, so they are clear on how you feel and can help you feel safe. Also, talk with a staff at your facility. They need to know what is going on and can help safeguard the abuse from happening again. Remember if no one knows what is happening they can't help you.
We know this is a really scary thing to be going through, but you are not alone. There are people who can and will help you! We are always here, 24/7, if you need to talk.
Sweetie, you need to go forward with prosecution. This person is harming you and has no right to do it. My daughters were raped and they tell me that after 12 years what helps them is the fact that we prosecuted the person and they feel that justice was done. If you don't do it your mental health will be affected for life. Please, speak to someone you trust and find support with someone close to you. One thing, never feel ashamed or guilty, this is the guy's fault not yours in any way, he is the sick one, not you. You have nothing to be ashamed of. I am proud of you for reaching out, you are very brave so keep being brave and don't let this guy hurt you anymore or hurt anyone else. Don't fear retaliation, just be firm and keep focused on making justice. Other people that he may have hurt too may come out and support you, maybe they are also scared and haven't said anything yet. God is always with you... remember that, He is your strength and you can do anything with God by your side.
stop and take a breath. You have done the right thing to let the detective know. Next let your therapist at the facility know what happened now. This resident needs to be separated from you and you need to see the medical staff at your facility to be examined and treated. Keep talking and keep telling until you get a response and by all means if you can, let your family or guardians know what happened. Retaliation fear is real. however, doing nothing puts you at risk for HIV, STI's etc. You can go in confidence to your medical facility, and ask for resident protection by moving you to another location. If you have access to a phone you also can call your probation officer, police, referral agency etc.. Your detective should get the ball rolling for you. If you are approached by this person again, be sick or act out to get some attention. Some one there is in charge and can investigate these instances. Stay calm and determined. You do not have to be a victim.
Wayne A. Yankus, MD, FAAP
expert panelist: pediatrics
you should tell the detective you want to prosecute but that your afraid and if theres anything they can do to protect you from him. but my advice to you is to prosecute he should pay for what he made you do. no human being should go through that.