Do you know of resources to help me deal constructively with my children's challenging behaviors?
Hi,im trying to find some type of resource to assist me in constructively dealing with childrens challenging behaviors such as hitting,bitting,shyness and continuously bullies other children on a regularly basis.
There are many different approaches you can take to mold and shape your children's behaviors however, the approach you take should depend on their age. When they are younger they learn by seeing and doing, therefore a behavioral approach is ideal. Rewarding for positive behaviors and giving consequences for negative ones will help them learn through action what you want as a parent.
As children begin to grow, teaching them to use their words and teaching them through your words will be more effective. Remember that kids will learn by example and genuinely want to please you, so make sure you are modeling the behaviors you want to see them repeat. For example, if you use yelling or sarcasm as a way to deal with problems, even if you don't think they always hear or see you, you are teaching them to react in the same way when they are faced with similar problems.
No matter what age they are, remember that consistency is important if you want to see long-term changes.
It is often important to evaluate when and where the behavior is occurring. Does it occur at home, or school…with adults, friends or siblings? Then ask yourself why it is happening. Is the child tired, anxious, jealous or trying to get attention? Sometimes an evaluation of the cause of the negative behaviors can help a parent to set the stage for more positive behaviors in the future.
There are many internet resources available on a variety of behavioral issues. Education.com has a variety of article on issues such as hitting, biting, and bullying. Another great resource is www.parenting.org. You can search by topic and even read e-mails from other parents with similar problems. Let us know if you have any other specific questions.
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Hi Sharon,<br />
As a mom of two young boys, I can understand your frustration in these areas! I think all kids go through some "rough spots" in their behavior as they figure out how to get along with other kids and solve problems using words instead of their bodies. It can be an exhausting, worrisome, and stressful time! Based on your post it sounds like you have a toddler. I found this article to be really helpful http://www.education.com/reference/article/Ref_Wonderful_Three_Year/ There are lots of other articles on education.com to help you understand and manage behavior issues. If you feel like your child's behavior is beyond "normal" then I'd check in with your peditrician for more help figuring out and solving the problem. I'm looking forward to seeing what other people post in response...I'm always looking for more ideas about how to keep my little guys on track! Let me know how your child's doing!<br />