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mofo
mofo asks:
Q:

When my son says he doesn't love me, should I be worried?

In Topics: Discipline and behavior challenges, Communicating with my child (The tough talks)
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Dr.Monika
Feb 19, 2011
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What the Expert Says:

Being a parent is not easy and sorting out through a child's emotions can be even harder.  How old is your son?  Have you noticed recently any changes in his behavior or mood?  Have there been any changes in his life?  

Children are affected by the environment just like adults are, maybe even more so, because often they cannot understand the circumstances and their meaning.  

If your son is sad, cries a lot, or exhibits aggression, or mood swing, take him to see his regular health care provider for an evaluation and possible referral to a pediatric therapist.

Best regards.
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Additional Answers (3)

pigtoria
pigtoria writes:
Hi Mofo....

It depends on when your son says he doesn't love you.  If he says that he doesn't love you in the middle of an argument or when he is getting time out (or some kind of punishment) then I wouldn't worry too much.  However, if he uttered the words during a normal, peaceful moments then I would be really concern.  I'll share a story here.

My friend's son is always telling and asking why his dad doesn't love him.  He doesn't know that the father he is living with is not his biological dad.  My friend and the dad discipline the son the same way but the son never questioned about the "love" from my friend but yet he questioned about it when it comes to the dad.  I've always felt that children see love with their heart.

In regards to your situation, the next time your son says that he doesn't love you, ask him why - ask for specifics.  Work on building your relationship from what he says and I am sure soon enough you'll build and have a strong bond.  Good luck!

Hope this helps!

Vicki
> 60 days ago

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Karenmom
Karenmom writes:
Hi mofo,

I don't want to make light of this situation, but in the words of Bill Cosby "If they don't say that they don't love you at some time or another, then you're not doing your job right".

Love between parent & child is unconditional and although they may express their anger in unique ways, it's nothing to be alarmed about.  Just remember to reassure your child that you always love them, and it's even more important to let your son know that you love him at these times of anger.

Best wishes!
> 60 days ago

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CreativeRachna
CreativeRac... , Child Professional, Teacher writes:
Children sometimes like to see how far they can test the waters.  He may be looking for some sort of reaction from you.  I wouldn't be too worried about those sorts of comments as long as his behavior in school and at home is generally loving and happy.  Hope this helps!
Rachna
> 60 days ago

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