Recently in the past few months my 9 year old son has started stealing and lying severely about it. He has stole toys from his Great Grandma's house, then stole my wedding band and hid it, then this weekend we took him and my daughter (3) to the local science center and he stole a bracelet from the gift shop. I have confronted him about each thing and he has repeatedly lied to me about it telling me that he didn't, and that he found the bracelet. When I confronted him about this latest incident I literally said this looks exactly like the bracelet from the store, did you take it? And I gave him the chance to tell the truth. But he didn't it took my husband to come home from work and ask him, and as soon as he asked he confessed. And even confessed about my wedding ring. We have asked him why he has done these things but the answer we always get is "I don't know". I was raised that is never an answer. My husband and I are at a loss of how to go about this. Please help.
We're so glad you decided to reach out for some help with your parenting question. Whenever a child is acting out it can definitely be a confusing and upsetting experience for the parents. It sounds like you have tried addressing this behavior by talking with your son, which was a great approach to take, way to go. When you catch your son stealing or in a lie, it is important to always use that experience as a teaching opportunity for you to take your son what he did wrong, why it was wrong, and what he should have done differently. Also, following up these teaching opportunities with a consequence (and being firm and consistent with those consequences) is important as well.
Make him take back whatever is he stole and admit that he took it. You might even set up a time to talk to a jail or juvenile detention place and let him see what will happen if he continues.
I think there is two separate issues here. stealing and lying. I have taught my 6 year old, if you tell me the truth you might be in trouble but if you lie to me that trouble is MUCH bigger. She is starting to learn that lesson.