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MeonlyME
MeonlyME asks:
Q:

A student who has been teased and bullied is now a 'bully' himself. He teases mostly girls. Please advise.

In Topics: Bullying and teasing
> 60 days ago

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Expert

Boys Town National Hotline
Oct 20, 2011
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What the Expert Says:

Bullying is a difficult topic to cope with and often the dynamics of bullying can change over time.  It can sometimes happen that children who are picked on become bullies themselves.  It may be that this is the way that the child has learned to keep themselves from becoming the target of the bullies.  We are sorry you are experiencing this.  

In order to effectively address bullying there need to be clear school policies that are consistently and effectively enforced.  Some bullying can be addressed also by simply raising awareness and educating your entire student body about...

1-What is bullying and what are the dynamics
2-What are some effective intervention and prevention strategies that targets can use.
3-What are some effective intervention and prevention strategies that bystanders can use.  Bystanders are the people who witness bullying and have a choice to either take steps to help the ally, help the bully, or simply ignore the situation.

Often these bystanders can be the ket to changing a school environment.  It may be especially effective if you can get one of this student's friends to help him learn other ways to help himself or to help him keep from getting into trouble with bullying. Also speak with his targets about ways they can keep themselves safe or possibily stand up to him in a respectful way.  

Bullying is a tricky problem and there are no silver bullet, one shot ways to stop all bullying.  It takes time, help, and a supportive environment.  

Please feel free to call our hotline if you would like to talk about this further.  We are here to help and the call is free.

Counselor, Dominic
Boys Town National Hotline-A hotline for parents and teens
1-800-448-3000
www.yourlifeyourvoice.org

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Additional Answers (5)

BananaJustine
BananaJustine writes:
It is very common to tease the opposite gender. All you can do is try to stop him but don't make him apoligize or he will strike harder.
> 60 days ago

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dyl404
dyl404 writes:
I'm sorry this is going on friend. Try talking to this person and ask him, "Do you remember when you were bullied. How did you fill"? You can imagine how people fill when they are bullied. Tell him people fill the same way when they are bullied.
> 60 days ago

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RDTP
RDTP writes:
tell him to pick on boys, not cool @ all
> 60 days ago

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EdieRaether
EdieRaether , Teacher writes:
When someone has been bullied they will often ACT OUT if they are not guided and given more constructive outlets for their feelings and emotions.  You need to ask him about it and bring a stop to it by getting the school to be active in intervention. You might also confront the child or his parents as well. It is a domino effect and intervention is crucial.   You must increase his awareness of the hurt he is causing others and how he can more constructively deal with his own hurt.  
Girls are often smaller and easier targets if he is not a large child himself.
> 60 days ago

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EdieRaether
EdieRaether , Teacher writes:
OOOps.   Forgot to mention there are lots of free articles on my website as well as my book, Stop Bullying Now which has been very helpful to others with similar problems.
> 60 days ago

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