TiggerF asks:

We have two toddlers and an ll year old who does not want to interact with the children.  How do we go about working on this behavior?

In Topics: Communicating with my child (The tough talks)
> 60 days ago



Hand in Hand
Jun 13, 2013
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What the Expert Says:

Dear TiggerF,

Even though there is a large age gap between your 11 year-old and your toddlers, the siblings can still have good relationships. A wonderful place to begin is by filling up your 11 year-old with your undivided attention, warmth, and caring at a time when the toddlers are not around. The more connected to you the preteen is feeling, the more flexibility he or she will have to share with the younger kids. We call this "Special Time." Basically, you set a timer for any amount of time you have, even five minutes can work wonders, and you prevent distractions or interruptions for that time, focusing entirely on your older child and whatever he or she wants to do for those minutes. The time belongs to that child, you are along for the ride bringing your love, appreciation, and attention.

After you have started working in some Special Time with the preteen, you'll be able to start to use the ideas in the Siblings article attached below.

Have a wonderful time as the kids, and you, all become more connected.

Julianne Idleman
Hand in Hand Parenting
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